


Unforgettable

by bartmanskubs



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: 6 years after fic, Fix-It, Multi, they are OOC but its been 6 years and my babies are all grown up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2018-12-14 20:35:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11790966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bartmanskubs/pseuds/bartmanskubs
Summary: "It's not good enough for me, since I've been with youIt's not gonna work for you, nobody can equal me"She wonders if she’s courageous enough to stand up and look him in the eyes without making much of a scene. She’d love to not be the only one who’s so affected by the encounter though and wouldn’t be herself if she didn’t do anything about the occurrence.He handles the questions well, too well for Eva’s liking and she decides she needs to change that.





	1. One

When you ask Eva, if she likes her internship in one of Oslo’s biggest PR companies, she won’t hesitate to answer a _fucking yes_. She loves that she can see the real world of what she studies to be. She loves getting experience in flesh, she loves the dynamic of events, she loves the brainstorms and the people she is able to learn from and watch them handle the matters both gracefully and powerfully. Eva also loves the fact it's so strongly connected to the studies she got to love so much in the last four years. She just hates all the exhaustion that comes with handling one with the other without going completely nuts.

It has to be worth it though, she thinks as she runs through the streets of Oslo trying to get to the campus for one of their weekly _talk with a pro_ kind of meetings that is being held in their lecture hall by professor Gundersen during the second semester of her Public Relations Management master studies.

And she just loves these meetings.

So it would be amazing, if the job Eva loves as well, wouldn’t make her late all the fucking time.

Eva’s finally at the entrance but doesn't stop there and races towards the enormous, wooden double door that she’s gotten to know well in the last four years. There’s some kind of fondness connected to that place that makes Eva like the huge room. Maybe it's because she started her first day in there, she also went through her first degree graduation in there. Or maybe it was that one night when she snuck into the hall with a gorgeous portuguese exchange student named Flávio during one of the University's celebrations on her second year and had sex with him on one of the seats in the last row.

Eva slows down at the memory, catching her breath and patting her strawberry blond hair down and out of her face. She has made a pretty good name for herself among the students and would like to keep both her appearance and confidence that way.

She’s definitely not the walking mess she was only a couple of years ago, when she was fresh out of high school and had not even a slightest idea about what to do in her life. Eva is still her happy self who can be the centre of every party if she only wants to. She still has a group of friends surrounding her, some of which have been by her side since her high school days and some that she’s gotten to know along the following university years. But she is more confident than ever now. Doing something she likes and actually being good at it has been a foreign concept for her until last year. And damn, she missed out on the feeling, because she’s never felt this powerful.

And in addition to her more mature self, she is damn proud of her looks. She remembers still being in touch with Vilde during her gap year and having that much time at her hands, she let her friend talk her into singing to a nearby gym. It was hard at first, since Eva had never been an athletic type but Vilde’s ongoing motivation, her own determination and her attraction to one of the trainers (that she was sleeping with by the end of Vilde’s university year) got her hooked up on the whole thing. So when Vilde switched schools to join Magnus in Trondheim and when Eva got accepted to the University of Oslo, she didn’t give up on the activity, loving the rush of adrenaline and pure ecstasy that comes with tiring her body down. And even now when she has so little time for herself, she tries to hit a gym or go for a run at least once a week.

Besides her hair is done most of the time these days and somehow she perfected her make-up skills to the point she’s considered a make-up specialist and to-go person in times of crisis (which often happens with Sana around and her best friend is always first to remind the group of the time when Eskild used to say that Eva should've given up on doing her make-up and leave it to professionals).

Her style is much more mature as well. It's mostly influenced by her work and the unspoken way everybody looks like. It was a natural transition for Eva though, because she changed, her mindset changed, her life changed, so her style has to change along the way as well.

And she’s twenty four in two months for god’s sake.

By the time she walks down multiple rows of chairs to get to her usual spot on the left corner of the lecture hall, most of the students are already there. But it hasn’t started yet, even though professor Gundersen is already talking animatedly with a man in a military uniform, who’s standing with his back to the students. Eva takes her seat and scrunches her brows, trying to figure out why in hell would they have a talk with a soldier. She decides to trust the professor, though, because he’s never disappointed her interest before.

Eva can sense movement to her right and soon enough a ball of energy in the form of her roommate basically throws herself at her usual seat. She smirks to herself, then chuckles before even looking at her friend.

“And here I thought, I’d be the one to be late.” She looks at Astrid, whose state doesn't disappoint her expectations. Her friend’s blond hair is disheveled, her cheeks are flushed pink and her lips are stretched in a huge grin. “Here,” Eva says pointing to the corner of her mouth deepening her smirk in amusement. Astrid playfully rolls her eyes, the grin never leaving her face as she takes her phone out of her jacket to inspect her smudged lipstick. “I thought you and Elias the douche were over with whatever you were doing,” she continues turning her voice into a whisper, noticing everyone else has gotten quiet already.

“Yeah…” The blonde breathes out softly with a joking manner. “His mouth is so convincing though.” Eva does everything to suppress her laughter with her hand while her friend sends another playful look her way but soon Astrid’s whole face changes and Eva’s giggle turns into a frown as her friend’s lips part and her eyes are stuck on a stage in front of them. “Well, I wouldn’t mind using my mouth to convince _him_.”

It’s just then, when she decides to turn her attention back to the stage, that in a very slow second everything around her stops.

“Students, let me introduce Officer Christoffer Schistad, the spokesman of Norwegian Intelligence Service, better known as the face of Norwegian Military. Officer Schistad is here to tell you about his work and give you tips at how to act in a dynamically changing situation such as for example a press conference.”

Eva doesn't think she will be able to move again. She’s paralyzed from shock, she’s sure of that.

But, honestly, how the actual fuck?

It's Chris.

_Penetrator Chris._

Excuse her, Officer Penetrator Chris.

And after six years of complete silence, he's right there, in front of her, standing on a podium in her favourite lecture hall. He’s here, with his broad form (much broader than she remembers) covered by a military uniform, his jaw so strong her mouth waters at the sight, his inviting but reserved smile and his beautiful, beautiful face.

_The face of the military indeed._

His features matured so much but one thing hasn’t changed at all. He’s still striking as hell and able to bring Eva to her knees in a matter of second.

“Thank you, professor, for the introduction but mostly for an invitation. It's an honour to stand here in front of you and speak about the job I’m so lucky to have. I need to point out though that it's the first time I’m speaking about my job like this and since I’m only a couple of years older than you, it’d be amazing if you guys could go easy on me and cut me some slack.”

And there it is.

The charming persona that gets you eat out of his hand the way he wants you to. A murmur of chuckles and giggles going around the hall seems to be enough of a confirmation of that.

And his voice. Goddamnit, that voice.

Eva would give up everything for her body to not react the way it does right now.

He keeps talking and even though he’s still rocking his charisma, she can’t help but notice how professional he sounds, how focused he is on the subject and how factual he makes his speech to be.

Eva has never seen him like this before, so sure of himself and so in his element.

She doesn't even count the time, because she’s staring at him without really apprehending his words. Astrid makes fun of her twice telling her to not drool this much but she can’t stop analyzing his every movement.

It feels like an out of body experience, to be honest.

The last time she saw him he looked and sounded like a little boy compared to how he presents himself now.

Eva stops herself right there.

Because the last time she saw him, he left the party with another girl even though he came there with Eva after convincing her of his feeling for weeks.

Her jaw sets so hard, she’s afraid for her teeth for a second.

Eva can see Astrid frown in confusion in the corner of her eye and that makes her breathe in and out slowly and calm herself down.

She stabilizes her breathing and fights her reappearing emotions inside, when she notices microphones being passed around the rows and students starting to ask Chris questions about the aspects of his work that interest them the most.

She wonders if she’s courageous enough to stand up and look him in the eyes without making much of a scene. She’d love to not be the only one who’s so affected by the encounter though and wouldn’t be herself if she didn’t do anything about the occurrence.

In the long moments when she tosses pros and cons of the situation, she notices hands shooting up into the air one after another and Chris beaming at the popularity. He handles the questions well, too well for Eva’s liking and she decides she needs to change that.

She notices a microphone being handed to the girl she’s acquainted with and wastes no time at catching her attention. “Trine, are you using it?” The girl shakes her head and passes Eva the microphone without further questions. “Thanks.”

She can see Chris finishing on another one of the answers and she knows it's the time she needs to step in. She fixes her white-blue striped skinny jeans that end up inches above her ankles, checks if her long-sleeved red top is still perfectly tucked into her trousers and pats her parted in half, straightened hair that reach past her shoulders and add some desired elegance to her overall look on a daily basis.

Her hand flies up without thinking the moment a blond guy looks satisfied with the answer Chris has just given him and a small nod from professor Gundersen sets her in motion. She watches Chris reach for a bottle of water before drinking a couple of full gulps from it and decides it's high time she speaks. “Like you pointed out already, your job can be very dynamic and full of surprises. So my question is, are you always this collected or are there questions or… situations that can catch you off guard?” Eva’s proud of her steady voice and neutral expression. Chris is still drinking from the bottle, nodding along the question with an apprehensive smile but when he takes the last sip, he looks up to find her in the crowd. And when their eyes meet, his own widen and he literally chokes on the liquid.

A wave of chuckles and laughter raises among the students and Eva smirks to herself, covering her face with a microphone. He’s still looking at her until he clears his throat, trying to avert his attention away from her just then.

“Mohn just gets that reaction out of you, man.” She hears a voice shout and she can tell in a second that it’s Alex, the year’s clown, also known as a guy that has been trying to ask her out since the year started, the guy who declared she'd be his wife one day and one that she’s spoken to three times in her life and doesn't want the fourth to happen.

That’s why she rolls her eyes, even though she kind of likes his advances now when Chris is still trying to regain his composure after she shook him up so badly.

“And yet you still fall asleep alone at night.” It's no one else but Astrid and everybody bursts out laughing again. Eva chuckles along watching Alex sink into his seat with an annoyed eyeroll.

“Excuse them, Officer Schistad.” Professor’s voice gets everybody to shut up in a second. His statement is powerful, but Eva knows him too long to not notice the hint of amusement in his tone. “You’d thought that people are mature enough by twenty three.”

Chris is forcing a smile so hard Eva wants to high-five herself.

“Back to the question… Apparently I still have a lot to learn in this area.” He laughs it off awkwardly setting off another wave of chuckles but she can see him trying to avoid her general direction at all cost. “Of course I’ve had to deal with some difficult questions so far in my career but I was taught to always be ready for whatever could be thrown my way. I have an amazing team as well, they prepare me for every possible scenario that can unfold in a conference room. Another thing is that the NIS hasn't really been a controversial institution during my work as their spokesman so far and hopefully it stays that way as long as possible.”

He looks back at her only when he finishes. He smiles the way he did after each question and Eva kind of talks herself into smiling back and thanking him for the answer.

She plops down on her seat and it's like all  bravado has left her body in one big exhale. She can see Astrid eyeing her curiously and Eva’s sure dozens of questions are lining up in her head but her friend knows her too well to voice any of them right now.

Eva is extremely grateful for that.

The panel seems to be coming to an end after that. Chris answers another question and finally gives the floor back to the professor. He steals glances at Eva the whole time as well.

Eva stands up slowly from her seat, not rushing out of the hall the way all the other students do, unsure if she wants the confrontation to happen or not. She notices professor engaging Chris in a conversation and she sighs quietly not being able to stall her leave without being too obvious about it any longer.

“Let’s go” she tells Astrid who has been waiting by her side letting Eva make her mind by herself.

“Are you sure?” the blonde asks which makes Eva bite her lower lip and look down at Chris in consideration.

She’s hesitant for another second before she nods at her friend, smiling. “Yeah, come on crazy.”

The april air soon hits her face and somehow she can breathe again.

“Are you coming home or back to work?” Astrid bounces energetically to her right, as if nothing has happened at all. Eva can’t help but grin her way feeling much lighter in the company of this sunshine of a person.

“Home. I managed to finish everything for today” she answers proudly with a crooked smile.

“Fantastic!” Astrid says jumping two steps in front of Eva and starting to walk backwards facing her without a worry in her life. “Netflix and wine then? We can call Sana and Chris to join us if you want.”

Eva’s smile widens again at the mention of her two high school best friends that stayed by her side for all these years and whose company she could definitely use after everything that has happened today. Besides she could never be grateful enough for how considerate Astrid always seems to be. “That’s actually an amazing idea. You’re the best, you know?”

Astrid winks at her in response. But before Eva can say anything else, her friend smirks dangerously and starts speaking again. “So… was that love at first or one hundredth sight?”

Eva’s rolling her eyes before she knows it but then Astrid’s eyes move to her left and suddenly she’s looking past her.

“Eva! Eva, wait!”

She stops dead in tracks at the sound of his voice. She turns around hesitantly and there he is, striding her way with a nervous smile on his face.

Chris stops right in front of her, his eyes still slightly widened looking at her as if questioning if she’s real or not. They roam over her body without him even noticing it, starting at her white Converse trainers and stopping at her eyes. “Hi” he finally says with a huge smile.

“Hey.” Eva tries to collect herself with all her might and she must be doing something well, since his eyes move between her orbs and her curled lips as a natural reaction.

“What a coincidence, huh?” Chris continues, the corners of his lips turning up again.

“Yeah, who would have thought.” Eva fires back at the small talk with a raised eyebrow.

“Yeah, I know. You really got me there with that question.” And as the corner of his lip widens with a smirk, Eva feels it's the first time she’s actually seeing the guy she used to know those six years ago.

She can’t help but chuckle at that. “That wasn’t my intention at all,” Eva says matter of factly with only a hint of humour. The look in Chris’ eyes tells her he isn’t buying any of it. “Anyway, congratulations on your job. I'm glad everything worked out this well for you” she says truthfully, because whatever he did with his career is something exceptional and she couldn’t stop the proud feeling that overflows her emotions.

The happy smile that spreads over his face seems to be enough of a reward. “Thanks, and you too. I told you you’d get into UiO, if you decided to do it.”

“Yeah, I guess. It wasn’t an easy thing to do though.” The small talk seems too forced somehow. Eva knows it’s not the way they used to communicate. They used to be smooth with each other, they didn’t even have to talk much to know whatever the other meant. And now here they were; him, awkwardly rubbing his neck with a small frown as if wondering what else to say, and her, tensed and irritated because of it. “The uniform suits you pretty well.” Eva decides to speak and break the weird silence that fell over the three of them. Besides it's actually the first time she sees him in the military attire and she has to admit it's rather eye-catching.

“Yeah, well it's mostly just for the show.” He chuckles looking down at himself with a confident smile. “And you, wow, you still look amazing, but you’ve changed so much.” Chris looks at her with his eyebrows high again but it's the way he smiles so softly at her makes her bite the insides of her cheeks from squiling. “It's really been years, huh? I haven’t seen you since-” he cuts himself off with his eyes widening in shock at his own words and when he notices her discomfort, he immediately looks away.

Eva’s daydream disappears just then and she almost wishes this stiffness wasn’t their reality. That’s why she coughs out a small “Yeah” with a sad smile.

“Sorry for rambling. I'm just really surprised to see you” Chris finally says after a couple of moments and she can’t take her eyes of his tongue watering the corner of his mouth not believing she have been missing such a little gesture so much.

“Me too” Eva finally adds, because she hasn’t been this shocked in a very long time for sure.

The air is changing right then. Chris looks like he's fighting some kind of battle with himself and apparently one side of the conflict has won, because in an instant there’s a grin stretching over his face. “And not to be too forward, but are you free now? I was thinking we could grab a coffee and do some catching up.”

“Um, thanks but I have to go back to work right now.” Astrid's eyes shot up to her face in an instant the exact moment Chris’ smile falls. Eva’s almost forgotten her friend was there but she ignores her for another moment and starts a war in her mind herself. Because she’s really intrigued by him, by everything he is now. She wants to know what has been going on in his life, knowing absolutely nothing, since she unfollowed him on every social media immediately after the incident. And she’s twenty three now, she believes she’ll menage to control her teenage broken heart somehow. That’s why she takes a risk and speaks when he looks completely defeated. “But another time, maybe?”

Chris’ entire face lights up at that and when that trademark grin of his consumes half of his face again, Eva almost considers changing her mind and going straight for that coffee instead. “I’d love that. Wow, okay, I’m not stopping you then” he says still smiling even though he’s already taking steps backwards. “I’ll call you, yeah?”

Eva simply nods her head and with one last smile, he’s off to where he came from in seconds.

“Wow, that wasn’t awkward at _all_.” Astrid sums up after both of them stand still for another moment or two watching him go. “Anyway, he's even more beautiful up close.” Eva snorts but nods nonetheless, still amazed by the strange encounter. “So…” Astrid starts again as they begin to walk back to their apartment and Eva chuckles at her friend waiting for the upcoming question. “Is he your ex or something?”

Eva stays quiet for a second, biting her lip before sighing loudly. “That was Chris.”

“Yeah, I kind of got that at the panel.” Astrid rolls her eyes playfully, shoving Eva’s shoulder lightly.

“No Astrid, that was Penetrator Chris.” Eva states without looking at her friend.

A couple of seconds passes with confusion painted all over the blonde’s face before realisation visibly sinks in and she stops in her tracks, her eyes widen as her mouth falls open. “WHAT? That was _the_ Penetrator Chris? That one?!”

“Yeah, that Chris.”

Astrid looks visibly taken aback, so the silence that falls over them gives Eva time to run the whole thing over and over again in her head  and she's both dreading and feeling excited about the possible future meeting and all the things it can or doesn't have to mean. She’s so deep in her thoughts that now she’s the one caught off guard by a loud huff leaving her younger friend’s body.

“Huh. Now I understand why you couldn’t get interested enough in all the other guys. Damn girl, I’d keep up to these high standards as well if I were you.”

Eva looks at Astrid's still bewildered expression and can’t help but burst out laughing at the ridiculousness of it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, I know... It was supposed to be a one shot but I kept writing and writng and here we are with seven pages of only one scene. So after some advices from you guys I decided to post it in parts. There will be three or four of them and I will try to write something next week since I'll be all alone at work all day.
> 
> (And I know, I know... Left behind... I know I kind of... left it behind... but I'll try to come back to writing it now that I'm a little bit calmer about Skam).
> 
> What do you think? I love my babies all grown up here.
> 
> And Astrid is my absolute favourite!


	2. Two

Eva is sitting on the couch in her and Astrid's living room with a glass of rosè wine after stuffing herself with burritos that her roommate is specialised in. She’s pointlessly staring at the pink liquid, still thrown off tracks by today’s surprising encounter. She can’t actually believe it really happened.

Sana and Chris agreed to come as soon as possible, right after Astrid called them. Eva doesn’t know, what she told her friends, but they were there an hour and an hour and a half after respectively.

Sana, Astrid and Chris chat loudly and Eva joins them from time to time filling the air with her laughter. She’s off though, much quieter than usual. She doesn’t even join Astrid and Chris in teasing Sana about the possibility of the wedding ceremony she’s been postponing for ages after being engaged to Yousef for two years. Sana’s way too cute rolling her eyes at them and groaning exasperatedly but blushing nonetheless, while trying to come up with another excuse of why she can’t have the ceremony happening now. Eva as always grins her way and watches Chris nudge Sana’s shoulder playfully. But she’s a little bit too zoned out to really enjoy the moment, if she has to be honest.

And she knows exactly whose fault that is.

Somehow she can recall a very similar afternoon from around two years ago. It happened around the time that spending evenings with the three of them stopped being uncommon and started being some kind of a new tradition.

Eva remembers easily how Astrid and her became friends. It happened immediately after meeting each other in a lecture one day during their first semester. They were almost inseparable in campus to the point that they decided to rent an apartment together starting their second year. And it was the best decision, Eva’d made in a long time. Living with Astrid has been easy. Eva has never met anyone so positive, bubbly and full of energy in her life. And Astrid fit so easily with Sana and Chris, it was almost terrifying.

They were sitting just like that back then, with wine and fantastic homemade food, spending their time talking and laughing. All three of them, except Eva who was in a foul mood the whole evening and was getting drunk on her wine much faster than usual. The girls were trying to enjoy themselves, but Eva couldn’t miss their curious if not even worried looks they were sending her way time after time. Eva didn’t care though. She was bitter and angry at herself to the point, she emptied her bottle of her dry wine in less than an hour.

The problem was, Eva kept pondering on her life and certain decisions she’d made in the past couple of months, if not years even. Just thinking about it made her grab on another bottle of wine and remove the cork with a swift, practised move. She noticed the room going quiet exactly a moment later and she wasn’t even surprised when all three pair of eyes were suddenly trained on her.

“What got you in such a mood?” Sana was the first one to react, her eyes squinted a little, as if she was analyzing Eva’s every move. It was the most unnerving thing.

“Nothing” Eva murmured quietly in response.

“Bullshit!” Astrid singsonged loudly from across the room and it shocked Eva to no end as if it was a cruel joke. Because there was one person in her life, who loved to be dramatic like that. And it kind of had everything to do with everything at the moment. That was why she didn’t correct her roommate, instead she just drank straight from the bottle. “Maybe we should finally talk about why Eva keeps sabotaging her every relationship.”

“I’m not” she fired back between one sip and another. If they were really to have this conversation, she wouldn’t be participating in it sober.

“You kind of are” said Chris with an apologetic smile. Eva could only watch Sana nod with a raised eyebrow.

“So I’m assuming you and Mathias aren’t _a thing_ anymore” asked Sana matter of factly. Eva half hummed half snorted at that, not looking at either of them even though that was the truth. She came back home after a huge fight with Mathias and the fact that she wasn’t hurt at all, was one of the reasons why she was drinking right then.

“He wanted me to meet his parents” Eva said looking at them, before drinking another sip of her wine. The silence that followed her words, got her to speak again. “I told him that we weren’t like that. He tried to reason with me, but I kept saying no. I mean, come on! I’ve been hooking up with this guy for like three months, so obviously...” She knew she started to slurr a little bit by this point and she was getting angrier and angrier with every word. “He got mad, told me he couldn’t do it anymore and that he was breaking up with me. I told him that we were never together in the first place.” She got a hiss from Astrid, a scrunched face from Sana and an _Ouch_ from Chris in response. “He called me a bitch.” She tugged on her bottle and started downing it again.

“I would too, if I were him to be honest” Chris whispered after a moment and Eva glared at her over her bottle, before placing it on her tight.

“Thanks” she growled in response, but her friend only shrugged unapologetically.

The point was that Mathias was a great guy and maybe if she was different, he would’ve been perfect. His brown skin and black hair along with that beautiful smile were making her knees go week. And three months was a long time, he had every right to assume they were something more, Eva knew that. She knew that she should’ve been happy about his proposition, she should’ve been ready to be in a relationship with this kind and funny guy. But she wasn’t.

Flavio came to her mind immediately after. Their fling was just that - a fling. But they did spend some great time together and after he went back to Lisbon at the end of her third semester, she didn’t even miss him that much.

And when she started thinking about how her all relationships or flings had ended in the last couple of years, everything suddenly made sense.

For a second she thought that maybe she was simply aromantic. She heard about it a lot, seen a document or two on Netflix and it would’ve been an amazing explanation, if it had been true.

But it wasn’t.

She knew that what she’d felt for Jonas had been love at one point.

She also remembered how she’d felt _everything_ with Chris.

No one had made her feel anything close to that since then and Eva knew that she loved herself too much to settle for less.

She recognised she was drunk off her mind by this point. Her vision was blurry, her eyes started to water from anger, frustration, loneliness or longing (or probably all of them combined) and soon enough there was an angry sob ripping out of her throat.

“You’re right. I _do_ sabotage my own relationships” she said before she could notice Sana and Astrid at her sides and Chris crouching in front of her, reaching for her hand.

“Eva, what’s going on?” Chris’ soft voice did nothing to calm her down and soon enough she was breaking down probably for the first time, since the whole drama with Jonas.

“They’re not enough. They don’t make me feel enough. And this is all Chris fault!” Eva sobbed speaking in syllables, because she was choking so much on her tears. And in her drunken mind she knew it was the first time she let herself break because of that. She dismissed the feeling at first, laughed it off really. And even though he’d hurt her, she thought she’d moved on from her broken heart. But apparently she’d never had. “He made me feel _so_ much. And then he left. He left...” Another ugly sob broke through her body as she spoke again “And now nobody can make me feel like that anymore…”

Till this time she remembers strong arms around her, soft voices in her ear and soon after her laying on her bed and puking to a bowl Sana placed next to her.

Sana and Chris tried to talk to her about it afterwards, but she just excused the whole thing with her being a sad drunk and feeling frustrated and lonely, which was true to some extend. Besides the girls knew everything already, they talked about it a couple of times back after it happened. So it was okay.

She told Astrid her side of _everything_ some time later, when the blonde was the one who sniffled into Eva’s arm after a break up with both of them cuddled in her bed. She asked her about Chris and with a sad smile Eva told her. About the ridiculousness of Penetrators, about their first kiss and the whole cheating drama after. She told her about partying with him, spending nights and then days with him. She told her about pushing him away over and over again, and falling more and more in love with him every time he didn’t leave. She told her about the Eid party and how she’d never seen him again.

Until today.

Eva knows she zoned out for too long this time and it’s such a deja vu, it shakes her to the bones, because the silence in the room speaks volumes and once again there are three pair of eyes on her, waiting for an explanation. The difference is that Astrid lips are pressed together and she’s trying not to smile now.

“So…” Eva wants to snort when Sana starts her sentence like that. “Why are we really here?”

 _Straight to the point_ , she thinks. Fair.

She needs to talk about it, she knows that. She’d also use an advice or two from people who know her best, from people who knew her back then.

Astrid and her share a look and Eva doesn’t know, if she wants to start talking about it or rather she doesn’t know _how_ to start talking about it. She’s still too shocked and confused, that’s why she nods at the blonde with a small smile.

Astrid sighs, looking at Chris’ and Sana’s confused faces with an unreadable expression before speaking. “You know we have these weekly meetings with professionals, who tell us about their work and how it can be helpful in our future jobs.” Both of them look even more confused now, but nod anyway. “So today we had a meeting with the spokesman of the Army and he told us about the ways we can handle a press conference. Our guest was Officer Christoffer Schistad” she finishes, before pursing her lips together and waiting for their reactions with excitement. Eva was watching the whole thing a little bit amused, she has to admit. As if it didn’t concerned her the most.

There are seconds of silence before Chris looks her straight in the eyes, startled. “He’s an Officer and the spokesman of the Army?”

Sana’s expression means she’s honestly taken aback, that’s why Eva isn’t surprised when she hears that familiar “ _Huh?_ ” leaving her mouth.

“Yeah. He followed her outside when the meeting was over and after a _very_ awkward conversation, he wanted to take her out for coffee straight away. Eva lied she had to go to work” Astrid finishes with a pointed look thrown her way and Eva rolls her eyes at that.

“Huh?!” It’s Sana again and it makes Eva snort, causing all of their heads to snap in her direction.

“Why the fuck are you laughing?” Astrid throws her way amused.

“I don’t know” says Eva calming herself down, truly confused by her own outburst. “You guys look hilarious.” She points at her old friends.

Sana places her fingers at her temples and shakes her head trying to get rid of the shock, before looking straight at Eva. “You want to tell me that Chris is an Officer _and_ the spokesman of the Army now, that he gave you a _lecture_ at _your_ university and then asked you out and you brushed him off?” Her voice raises with every word and Eva nods every time it changes a tone.

“I didn’t brush him off” Eva says and this time it's Astrid who rolls her eyes. “I told him I couldn’t do it today, which is pretty understandable, since I didn’t want to make a complete fool of myself and cause a scene. Or worse.”

“So… what is he like now?” Sana’s curious eyes find hers after what seems like minutes of contemplative silence.

Eva laughs nervously at that and closes her eyes for a couple of seconds to reminisce about the short meeting. “He’s… Chris. Matured, serious, very professional but people still eat out of his hand the way he wants them to, he charms everybody around him, including professor Gundersen. He’s still confident, easy going and” Eva sighs “ridiculously gorgeous.”

“Damn…” Sana whispers.

“I’ll believe you in anything about my name twin Chris, but him being serious? Come on.” Chris states, disbelief all over her face.

“He really is,” Astrid pipes in “except when he’s rambling and blushing in front of Eva…” Her blonde roommate gushes towards other girls and Eva tries really hard to ignore it.

“Nothing’s changed then…” Sana muses with a knowing smirk and Eva has to bite her cheeks from saying anything back. Or blushing herself.

“Wait a second? How did he know you were there in the first place? Were you seated in front of the stage or something?” asked Chris with a curious face.

Eva notices that Astrid’s whole expression lightens up with a grin as she stands up and raises her hands. She literally squirms at her sofa at what's about to come.

“This savage here stood up at the end of the panel and with a completely straight face asked _You are so collected but are there situations that catch you off guard?_ while he was drinking water and he looked at her and literally choked on it! Can you fucking believe it?”

Astrid is jumping a little bit at the end of her exciting speech, that Eva thinks, she said all in one breath. She looks at her old friends and their bewildered expression before they all burst out laughing.

 

***

 

It’s been getting late. Chris had to go home, because she’s starting an early shift at a coffee shop in the morning _slash_ bar at night that she’s been working at for several months now. Astrid went to her room even before that, as she has an essay that she left for the last day to finish.

But Eva is laying on her couch, with her head on Sana’s lap and her eyes closed. Her best friend is playing with her hair and Eva knows, she’s trying to ease the stress the surprising meeting caused her. They are both waiting for Yousef to pick Sana up and enjoying each other’s presence to the fullest.

The comforting silence is so pleasing, Eva thinks, recalling the laughter that filled the room only moments ago. And even though the girls were shocked at the news, they quickly changed the subject, clearly giving Eva space to think it all through. Eva is so grateful for that. For them being a part of her life really. But she knows she still needs to talk about her feelings at one point. She just doesn't know how to do that, to be honest. That’s why she opens her eyes and looks at Sana’s soft smile with a straight face.

“Why are you really postponing your decision about the wedding?” Eva says, wanting to ask her best friend about her motives as well. She’s been waiting for a moment like this to really talk to Sana for some time now, since they’ve both been getting more and more busy these days. Her friend smirks in the corner of her lips probably at Eva’s tactique to change the general subject of the afternoon, but sighs before the smile comes back to her face.

“Why are you asking?” Sana says without giving her a straight answer.

“It’s just... You’ve been engaged for more than two years now and together for six. You’re graduating your med school at the top of your class in three months. Nothing’s stopping you and I’m just really curious, what’s happening in that beautiful head of yours.” Eva finally voices her thoughts and concerns about the situation, patting Sana’s forehead to make a point.

“If I told you, I’d have to kill you” Sana says jokingly, trying to tickle her.

Eva swats her hand and pushes herself off her lap to look her in the eyes. The seconds of silence that follow let her make her mind about what she wants to say. “I’ll probably sound super ignorant, but I know how important your religion is to you, so is it because he’s not Muslim?”

“You’re not being ignorant.” Sana chuckles but she looks down a second later, considering the question for a short moment. “I wouldn’t have asked him to be my boyfriend, if it was the case. Wouldn’t have accepted his ring.” Sana says with a soft, but somehow nervous smile and Eva squeezes her hand lightly for comfort. “I love him, I adore him really, he’s the best man I’ve ever met, the love of my life, but…” Sana blushes suddenly and Eva has to force herself to not pinch her cheek as well. “I don’t know… It’s stupid. But I guess I don’t want to be the first one to get married.” She gives her a pointed look and Eva understands everything.

“Sana…” She starts. “Who cares? You’re twenty four, he’s twenty six, that’s a pretty normal age to marry the guy you’ve been with for years. I would, if I were you. And even though it’s going to be a beautiful and very important day and it’ll change a lot of stuff, it’s just a ceremony. I know how you care about your career, but you’re not having a kid now, it won’t be affecting anything, not in a bad way, at least.” She adds, smiling that bright, pure smile of hers.

“I know I’m an idiot.” Sana covers her face with her hands, laughing quietly as Eva’s arms wrap around her body.

“That was the most ridiculous reason, you could’ve honestly come up with.” Eva laughs squeezing Sana’s body even more.

“Thank you. I needed to hear that” Sana says when they finally part a little bit to look into each other’s eyes. “I also need to finally tell that to Yousef. He’s been getting pretty anxious about me avoiding the topic lately.” Eva’s heart nearly explodes, she’s this happy about her friend finally making her mind. She watches as Sana suddenly wrinkles her nose and that little thing causes her smile to deepen in seconds. “I was kind of hoping Noora would be the first, to be honest.”

Eva doesn’t even cover her snort. “You know how William is. They’re going to marry at forty, by the time he reaches all of his goals.” Eva rolls her eyes a little bit too much at that, but when Sana pokes her side and sends her _the_ look, her whole demeanor changes. “Talking about Noora, how is she these days?”

“Same old really. She goes to her classes, writes her articles, spends time with Eskild and Linn, talks about William a lot” Sana lists, not hiding her amusement.

“I’m not missing out on much, then” Eva states not hiding her disregarding tone.

“Eva…” Sana sighs already recognising, what they're getting into.

But it only makes Eva go into a full defensive mode. “What?”

“Why can’t you just call her?” Her friend tries again, but without much conviction. Eva knows they’ve had this conversation too many times before for the question to have any influence on her.

“Why? Has she been asking about me?” Strawberry blonde questions, knowing she’s won this round after Sana’s eyes soften. “Exactly. I’ve been trying to stay in touch with her, initiated every contact since high school, you know that and yet-” Eva stops herself right there and sighs. “Look, I know we’ve been close once, but we grew apart. She made sure of that herself. Besides we haven’t been seeing eye to eye with each other even before the school ended.” Eva wouldn’t be herself if she didn’t add the last part. Because she really tried to maintain contact with a girl, who was an inspiration for her once. She misses the Noora she got to know that first year at Nissen, but she also can’t agree with Noora she is now. Especially since she doesn’t seem to have a problem with not having Eva around her at all.

The redhead shakes that unwelcomed bitterness off her mind, since she dealt with it a long time ago and decides it won’t ruin her mood today. Not this time.

“Alright” Sana says matter of factly, though her entire expression changes to serious, when she looks up at her with those pretty eyes of hers. “So… Chris.”

Eva takes a deep breath and bites her lip after exhaling loudly. “Yeah.”

“What do you think about it?” Sana tries, tuning her all attention towards her best friend. Eva knows why, she’ll try to read more than Eva will tell her herself.

“I don’t know. I’m mostly overwhelmed with a lot of different emotions.” She says truthfully. It feels so good to say her intrusive thoughts out loud and there’s no better listener than Sana and there never will be. Plus, she never judges her, even if she disagrees with her decisions. That’s one of many reasons Eva loves her so much.

“Like?” A simple question makes her really think and name all of her thoughts.

“I’m surprised, very curious, intrigued, happy, pumping with energy but also angry, hurt, super stressed, freaked out. There’s a lot of that.” Eva lists with a raised eyebrow and a funny expression. It’s so good to finally be able to talk about things related to Chris, now when she stopped suppressing everything that related to him inside.

“That sounds exhausting.” Sana chuckles with a comforting smile. “Are you going to meet him?”

“Like I said I’m super intrigued, so yeah, probably. He has to call first, though.” The answer is clear, although it doesn’t stop a nervous sigh from escaping her lips.

“From what Astrid told us, he will.” Sana confirms, smirking and when Eva blushes red, her cheeky smile deepens, showing her dimples that the strawberry blonde loves so much.

“You know Astrid likes to blow everything out of proportions.” Eva rolls her eyes playfully, glancing at her roommate’s door.

They both giggle knowing damn well the blonde listens to their every word and soon enough her head leans out of the half-open door with a frown. “Hey!” Astrid calls, before putting her tongue out at them and shutting the door behind her.

It takes them a moment to calm themselves down, but when their laughter dies down to soft chuckles, Sana looks back at her with a pointed look. “And you like to play down the importance of things.”

“True, I guess” Eva agrees with a scrunched nose, which brings another chuckle out of her friend.

“What’s the plan, then?” Sana smiles and raises her eyebrow with curiosity. Eva just knows she pushes her to make at least some sort of decision about the whole situation.

That’s why she looks down at her hands for a second, playing with her finger absentmindedly and trying to collect her thoughts. “I don’t know really”  she says at first, biting on her lower lip. “We’re both completely different people by now. But I guess I’m interested in what he has to say, for example about the things that happened at the end. And then I don’t know, we’ll see.”

“We’ll see? Does it mean you’d go out with him if he asked you? Like on a proper date?” Her friend finally asks, which causes Eva groan in discomfort.

“Sana…” she whines disapprovingly, throwing her head back and closing her eyes. “Why are you asking me all these difficult questions right now?”

“I don’t know” she shrugs. “Maybe because I know you need to have a straight answer about your own intentions instead of overanalyzing everything.”

It sound so easy in Sana's mouth, but Eva knows her friend is right. Because she sure as hell keeps analyzing every possible scenario that can unfold between the two of them. And she despises it with all her heart. “God, I hate that you know me this well” she groans again, but smiles widely before going back to her initial position and placing her head on her friend’s lap.

“Shut up” Sana dismisses her softly. “You’d die without me.”

“Probably.” Eva opens her eyes and grins up at her.

“So…”

“So… Let’s not talk about anything happening between me and Chris right now. What I am sure of is that I could never be just friends with him. We would never work like that.” Here, she finally says it. And it actually feels great to acknowledge that.

“Yeah…” Sana adds with understanding, which brings Eva to chuckle almost humorlessly.

“Any advices, then?” The redhead asks, smirking.

“Just be yourself, everybody loves you the way you are” Sana says with a wink. “But maybe try being less desperate for his dick and more collected around him than six years ago” she deadpans with a straight face, containing her laughter. Somehow she manages to do that, but her eyes shine with amusement. That’s why she’s not even surprised when Eva jabs her in the ribs.

They’re both smiling then and Eva can almost hear the wheels in her head slowing down. She relaxes to the feeling of Sana’s fingers traveling in her hair once more and she’s almost calm, but before she can open her eyes and thank Sana for existing, her phone rings.

Eva searches for it with her hand, fishing it out from between the cushions and it's already been ringing for some time, so she only glances at the unknown number and pick it up.

“Hello, who is this?” Her voice is maybe a little bit too harsh, too cold even. But it's the one she uses answering her phone at work and it just kind of became a habit. She doesn’t regret using it at all. Especially if someone disturbs her safe space with Sana.

“Hi, Eva. It's Chris…” Everything in her stops, along with her breathing. She side glances at her companion with wide eyes and apparently Sana knows who it is straight away. A mixture of excitement and nervousness paralyzes her body, that’s why she stays still, not answering. Chris must be mistaking her silence with confusion though, because he sighs adding “Schistad. Chris Schistad.”

And after another couple of seconds, Eva’s brain somehow starts working again. Not fully though, because it causes her to blurt out the first thing that comes to her mind. “Yes, I know. I recognised your voice.”

Sana facepalms.

Chris chuckles.

 _Not desperate and collected my ass. Nice job, Eva._ She thinks closing her eyes with embarrassment.

“Should’ve figured you didn't have my number anymore.”

She wants to think of any excuse other than the truth, which is that she deleted his number the day after Eid, but she reached her limit of petty for the evening, that’s why she goes with a straight answer. “You still have mine, though.”

“Yeah, I’m lucky I guess” he answers with a funny tone and she cannot figure out what exactly he is trying to say by this. “I was kind of hoping you didn’t change it.”

“You know… I don’t really like changes.”

“That doesn’t sound like a woman I met today.” Chris’ voice is low and it already does such dangerous things to her, she can’t really shake the feeling out of her body.

“You’re the one to talk” she teases, and she’s glad they’re speaking on the phone, because she would never be able to do that in person.

“Well, I’m not the one denying it.” He laughs this time and Eva hates so much the fact her smile involuntarily widens. Chris’ laughter finally dies down and she can clearly hear a sharp intake of breath on the other side of the line that follows shortly. “What are you doing this Friday?”

Eva’s eyes find Sana’s again and she nods with a little smile of encouragement. Her heart is beating so hard, she’s afraid everyone around her can hear it. Chris included. “This Friday?” she squeals rather than says and soon enough Sana’s hand starts her soothing massage again. It helps a little, so she brings herself to clear her throat and form a tight-lipped smile. “I have a couple of classes in the morning, then I have to go to work for several hours” she adds truthfully.

“So you’re free in the evening then? No plans?” Eva can easily hear excitement creeping over his previously nervous voice and it’s just almost too adorable for Eva to ignore the real meaning of it.

“Yeah. Unless there are plans I don’t know about” Eva says playfully and it comes out so smoothly, it surprise both her and Sana, who even congratulates her with a thumb up. She finally sounds confident and that’s the only thing, she needs to focus on.

The heartwarming feeling of Chris’ chuckle echoes in her phone and her heart misses a bit at that as it is a normal thing to do. “Would you go for a dinner with me then?” he finally asks on one breath and Eva somehow knows this conversation is as excruciatingly hard for him as it is for her. “It’d be amazing to talk and get to know each other again.”

The optimism in his voice is captivating and Eva finds herself nodding, before she can even form any thought. She knew she would agree to meet him even without him sounding so convincing, her curiosity got that out of her. But now she is even more asured she's making a right decision. “Yeah, that sounds alright.”

“I’m glad it does” Chris teases and it’s such a natural reaction to smile and roll her eyes in resonse, it’s almost terrifying. “I’ll pick you up at seven, then.”

“Okay. I’ll text you my address” Eva tells him after holding back a smile.

“Great! So I guess I’ll see you there” Chris says, letting out a deep breath.

It makes Eva laugh. “Yeah.”

“It was nice talking to you, Eva” he finally says after a moment of silence, smile evident in his voice. Eva bites her lip and smiles herself.

“Same to you" she says with a soft voice and before the conversation can gets any further, she adds a quiet “Bye, Chris” and hangs up.

The multitude of contrasting feelings that overwhelms all of her senses in seconds, makes her go completely still in Sana’s loving embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe the chapter is finished.  
> I can't believe it took me so long to write it, it feels like weeks and weeks of coming up with new lines.  
> I can't believe nothing happens in there and it's probably boring, but I love this chapter with all my heart.  
> I can't believe anyone would want to still read and comment on it (please prove me wrong on this one! <3)  
> I also can't believe that the only frienship we didn't get to experience is Evana and it's so glorious I had to write them the way they deserve.  
> I can't believe this chapter has 5,5K words and basically nothing happens in her.  
> I can only hope you guys love it!


	3. Three

The raining has stopped altogether some time ago but the clouds still hang low making the sky look darker that it really is and threatening people outside with possibility of pouring down anytime again. The weather isn’t exactly inviting, but Eva still feels excitement and nervousness filling every inch of her body at the thought of going out today.

Chris should be here any moment. He texted her he was on his way fifteen minutes ago and Eva’s grateful for the little warning.

She looks at herself in the mirror and for the tenth time that afternoon she convinces herself that she’s not overdressed. It’s her favourite outfit that she wears for important meetings or events at work after all. And Chris did text her to dress semi-elegant. Whatever that term even means. That’s why she straightens her elegant high-waisted, wide legged black trousers, fixes her white bralette that leaves a strip of her stomach for curious eyes to see but covers her cleavage and throws a black jacket on her arms. She’s fully satisfied with the way she looks and overdressed or not, she’s as confident as she can be in this situation.

Chris curled her hair in lazy waves earlier, the way she knows Eva loves the most and all of them pretended to work on her make-up, even though Eva was the one doing all the work. But she couldn’t possibly love them more. Their support and encouragement let her believe she can actually face one of her biggest ghosts tonight.

The sound of the doorbell echoes through the apartment without warning and there’s a sudden commotion outside her bedroom that causes her lungs to stop working. Her eyes focus on her door, as if she could look just through them and she takes a deep, shaky breath the moment she hears his voice.

“Sana… Hey!” Chris’ voice - although muffled to her ears - is clearly confused and she can almost imagine his taken aback expression. Eva’s sure he’s quick to recover, though. The way he’s always been.

“Well hello.” Sana’s voice is patronising and filled with amusement and Eva bites her cheeks at how excellent her best friend finds herself in this situation. “Please, come in.”

Eva would love to see his expression right now. He’s always been cautious around Sana, always told her that she was the only person he knew that could’ve put him in his place with only her raised eyebrow. She knew he had so much respect for Sana for the way she used to (and still do) carry herself, but he was always cautious to not say anything wrong in front of her. Especially if it referred to her friends. It was always hilarious to watch.

“Name twin, hey!” It’s Chris this time and her voice is so full of happiness and life, it causes Eva’s smile to grow. “Long time, no see.”

“Oh wow, hey” answers the former Penetrator and she’s surprised at how much his tone matches her friend’s. They were always an interesting mix.

“I’m Astrid.” Eva hears soon enough. Her roommate is as reserved as she expects her to be. She likes being taken as intimidating, even though it’s a tough call since she’s the epitome of sunshine. She can be scary when she wants to be though.

“Chris.” There’s an answer and Eva notices that every time she hears him speak, she barely breathes. “Sorry for not introducing myself the other day.”

“It’s cool. You were preoccupied, I get it.” The blonde’s voice is dripping with amusement now and Eva has to cover her mouth to stop herself from snorting. “I’ll go get Eva then. She should be ready by now.”

This gets her going. She quickly checks her lipstick and fixes her hair only to find the door already opening. Astrid walks in and checks her out with an approving smirk. “You look fantastic! And so does he” she says, whispering the second part and raising her eyebrow knowingly. “Better come out soon, Sana’s grilling him with her eyes.”

Eva’s grin widens and her smirk is probably as wicked as her friend’s one. “She knows what she’s doing.”

Astrid chuckles at that, shakes her head and starts leaving the room with the last knowing look thrown her way. “Act indifferent, just like we talked. You own his ass, remember that.”

“Sure I do” Eva answers after her friend before she can clearly hear her loud laughter from the door that are now ajar.

It’s the last shaky breath she takes that completely calms her down. With that she takes her purse and walks out of her bedroom as if she didn’t have a single bother in her life right now.

She can instantly see her friends’ eyes trying to contain their smugness as they start noticing her one after another and soon enough when she takes the last step around the corner, her confident smile falters just a little bit at the exquisite sight of him. It lasts only a millisecond when she’s caught off guards and even though he’s yet to look her way, she composes herself an instant later not wanting him to see any cracks in her well prepared mask.

He notices her now. His head turns Eva’s way the moment he senses her presence and his entire being follows not long after. His eyes widen and he winks once, twice, before taking in her appearance.

Eva doesn’t let the shaken feeling break her mask though, even though for everyone who knows her enough to notice her internal struggle, it’s obvious she’s fighting a little bit too hard to keep up her composure. (Sana’s raised eyebrow doesn’t go unnoticed by her.)

“Hi,” she finally throws Chris’ way raising a corner of her lips and breaking the tension between them.

“Hi. You look amazing.” It’s out of his mouth before he can stop himself, Eva thinks, because he purses his lips slightly before returning back to smiling her way.

“Thanks Chris. You too.” It’s out of courtesy, Eva thinks, trying to convince herself she’s not as affected as she really is. But when Chris’ smile widens so that his eyes wrinkle at the corners, she almost loses it.

Because goddamnit he looks so good.

With his styled short hair, the soft blue botton up he’s wearing under his leather jacket paired with his black skinny jeans.

She can barely make out Sana’s snort and Astrid’s mumbled _Oh god…_ before letting her smirk grow a little.

“So are we ready to go?” Eva finds herself saying to Chris after he visibly regains his composure and he nods with a small smile.

“Of course. I made a reservation for us at this amazing restaurant. Our taxi driver is probably getting annoyed by now though, so we better get going.”

“Yeah, come on, I’m famished.” Eva is surprised it doesn’t leave her lips but Sana’s and all of them turn in the direction of their friend, some with shocked, some with amused (Astrid) expressions.

Sana’s reaching the coat rack at this point and Eva notices she small chuckles at the welcomed attention. Eva watches Chris who’s having some kind of mental debate and for a second doesn’t really know if her friend is joking or not.

“I didn’t know you were all willing to come.” Chris voice is somehow tight but for some reason he goes with it. He shots a questioning look Eva’s way though, as if checking if she knows what’s going on. Eva ignores it with all the power she has left.

“Oh, well, who can refuse some great food and time with their old friends, huh?” Now she understands that Sana’s having the time of her life tormenting Chris.

Eva stops herself from snickering, especially after monitoring Chris’ confused and slightly distressed face. She can see he wants to both say no and not blunder.

“Relax Schistad, I’m only joking.” Sana finally says with a smirk, which makes Astrid and Chris snort loudly.

“That’s great, because I made that reservation for two anyway. But another time, yeah?” The big exhale that leaves his mouth doesn’t go unnoticed, especially after he raises his hand and combs it through his nicely styled hair.

“Yeah, yeah.” Sana smirks knowingly the way only she is able to.

“Enjoy your dinner then, kids.” Astrid pipes in and the tight atmosphere is gone instantly.

“You’re younger than us.” Eva rolls her eyes but grin nonetheless.

“Details, details.” The blonde singsongs, leaning against the wall.

Eva shakes her head amused and locks eyes with Chris. “Is it still raining?”

“It might be by now, but don’t worry, I took care of it.” He answers shaking the umbrella in his hand. And Eva hopes it’s not raining, because he has only one. For the two of them. And it would be extremely awkward if she took one for herself right then.

“Bye girls” she tells them, finally opening the door. “Have fun with whatever you’re planning to do.”

“See you next time” Chris adds passing them and taking a hold of the door behind her.

“Pretty confident, aren’t we?” Chris laughs his way causing him to look down with a small blush. The fact that Eva’s heart misses a beat at his still confident grin, stirs a huge variety of feelings inside her.

Chris high-fives him after that, Sana only nods and Astrid places two of her fingers to her forehead saying “Officer” in a deep voice.

The door are almost closed but just then they hear Sana speak again. “Oh and Chris,” she’s standing in the doorstep smirking with such smugness even Eva feels slightly taken aback. “Don’t do anything stupid or else I’d have to kick you. Again.”

Eva raises her eyebrows, confused about what her friend was referring to, but apparently Chris isn’t confused at all, because he purses his lips and nods acknowledgingly.

“Sure thing, Sanasol” he tells her and then he’s met with an eyeroll and slammed door a moment later. “Well that went well.” He chuckles as they start descending the stairs side by side.

“Sorry for that,” Eva says with amusement, not really feeling sorry at all. “They can be a lot with their overprotectiveness and dramatics.”

“Yeah, I remember. I’m actually pretty surprised I survived. I thought I’m as good as dead, when Sana opened the door.”

Eva rolls her eyes at that. “Don’t exaggerate. She can’t know I told you that, but she’s always kind of liked you.”

“Kind of liked me? Doubt that.” He half chuckles half snickers at the confession, placing his hand in his pockets and shaking his head.

It causes Eva to grin really, because even though she knows about Chris’ soft side, it’s still adorable how this grown up man who used to be the biggest fuckboy and heartbreaker in the town, can actually get all nervous and blushy. That’s why she nudges his arm with her elbow to get his attention. “Yeah, of course, that was a friendly talk. If she didn’t like you, I wouldn’t be here right now.” She smirks at first, but softens her smile some moments later, because it’s Sana they’re talking about and that’s how you feel about her no matter what.

“Really?” Chris raises his eyebrow along with the corner of his lips, eyeing her with interest as they walk outside the building. It’s not raining yet and Eva grins at the sky with gratitude.

“Yeah, she’d slam the door the moment she’d see you. She’s done that to William a couple of times.” She jokes remembering the times when Noora used to still show up at their door after some big fight with William and the guy, as annoying as in love with their friend he is, used to come to apologize not so long after that. If Sana was there that was his fate for the evening. Spending some time outside the door was his redemption in Bakkoush’s eyes. Eva wonders if Noora and William stopped fighting at all, since it’s been a long time the blonde was looking for consolation in their arms.

“Really?” He repeats shocked and when Eva nods, he adds “God, I love that girl.”

“Yeah, she’s kind of the best person alive, especially when she’s kicking people’s asses.” She smirks and then rolls her eyes at Chris as he opens the cab’s door for her. She watches him round the car and soon enough Chris slides into the backseat next to her. The driver starts the car without Chris giving him directions and Eva raises her eyebrow at that. “Continuing with Sana, what was she talking about at the end?”

He’s most definitely caught off guard by her question but plays it off with a smirk. “That’s a story for later.” He looks outside the window for a moment with a deep breath leaving his lungs and fingers playing with the unused umbrella. She doesn’t want to watch him like that, Eva tell herself, she’s just curious. She drops her gaze when he looks her way and when he changes the topic, she lets him without hesitating. “So do you guys all live together?”

“No, just Astrid and I. The girls were just curious, I guess. Besides sometimes I think they hung out with us all the time, because Astrid’s a fantastic cook.” Eva jokes.

“What happened to Noora and Vilde?” Chris asks then, facing her. Eva’s smile falls almost unnoticeably at the mention of her friends and even though she’d love for Chris to not pick up on that, he clearly does.

“Vilde lives in Trondheim now and we have little to no contact.” Eva says shortly with scrunched face and takes a breath before speaking again. “And Noora is a story for later, I guess.” Her words are mocking him but her expression stays neutral. She sends him a quick smile, before looking away and focusing on the streets of Oslo.

Eva was sure the night was going to be an emotional roller-coaster. But she didn’t think the atmosphere would become so tense so fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god! It's here!  
> I can't believe I'm updating!  
> Even though it's half of the chapter I was planing to add, I thought it'd be an amazing addition to this deserted tag.  
> I hope you guys like it.  
> The dinner is going to be intense that's why I'm putting all my thoughts and time into it.  
> Tell me what you think about it!


	4. Four

 

The restaurant makes her relax a little bit. The subtle hum of music along with the elegant interior help her feel at ease somehow. She’s sitting across from Chris, watching him with no shame from time to time, analyzing his nervous smile and confident eyes. It’s such an interesting thing to observe, Eva thinks, because everything about him seems even more intriguing to her now.

They’ve just ordered their food and are about to get their first glasses of wine when he stops looking anywhere but Eva and his eyes finally land on her face. She’s holding his gaze with a little knowing smirk forming on her lips, as his own curl in a small smile. And it’s finally there, the familiar nonverbal communication that they excelled in back in the days, so Eva exhales breathing out her last bits of nervousness, as she reads everything she can find in his eyes. _I want to talk to you_ , they say. _Soon. Today. But not yet. Not yet…_

The waiter finally brings them their drinks, white wine for her and red for him and she moves the glass to her mouth to wet her lips just a little bit. Her right cheekbone is facing him now, as she looks around the restaurant over her glass, slowly, drinking the view in. From the corner of her eye she can see his eyes glued to her face, watching her every movement and waiting for something, an opening of a conversation probably. But he stays quiet, patiently giving her all the time she needs. Somehow it lights something inside her she clearly recognises. And the _more than enough feeling_ is more terrifying than anything else right now.

“So the restaurant is nice…” Eva speaks putting her glass on the table. Chris is visibly startled by her voice after minutes of silence and it’s so clear he’s consumed by his own thoughts as deeply as she is with hers. Her smile unwillingly widens at that. “Although, I have to say, I thought you’d bring me to one of those Michelin restaurants.”

Chris chuckles at that, before dropping his gaze for a moment. “I was thinking about that actually, but then I remembered how picky you used to be about your food, so I thought it might not be the best of ideas…”

“I’m slightly offended,” Eva scoffs humorously “but good call, I guess.”

“That’s great to know.” His eyes are still reading her and Eva doesn’t know if she likes it or not.

“I’ve been hearing a lot of good things about this restaurant recently…” she muses lightly.

“Yeah, it’s the best italian restaurant in Oslo. I thought you might love it.” Chris leans back against his chair observing her reaction and Eva haven’t felt this vulnerable in a long time. But she’s always been good with hiding her emotions behind her playful smirk and curious eyes and it’s nice knowing she can still work with that, even though his eyes are already tearing down the wall that’s been surrounding her heart.

“So the small talk again, huh?” The brave look she throws his way seems to be a great cover, as she props her chin on her hand. “Didn’t we come here to get to know each other again?” she teases and feels so good causing Chris to roll his eyes.

“Straight to the point, I see” he chuckles again, reaching for his own glass of burgundy liquid.

“Why not,” Eva shrugs. “I have to say I’m kind of intrigued by this new Christoffer. And like you said the other day, it’s been years…”

Their eyes meet again, but the silent conversation between the two of them is as interesting as every word she expects to leave his mouth that night. Eva watches him tilt his head to the side with a question. _Is this really what you want to start talking about?_ She raises her eyebrow with the answer. _And you have a better idea?_

Chris’ mouth widens at the corner, forming a smirk. His shoulders fall loosely on the chair as he visibly relaxes. “Let’s get to know each other again then” he says before licking the corner of his mouth. Eva’s eyes follow its movement and soon enough Chris’ smirk widens in realisation. “So tell me something then…”

He’s visibly stalling with his own story and Eva’s curiosity gets the worst of her, as she quickly raises her eyebrow. _Really?_ “Like what?” she asks instead.

Eva watches Chris bite his lower lip absentmindedly, as he thinks about his answer. “Like for example, why public relations? Not that I’m disappointed, because we wouldn’t be sitting here, if you’d picked something else, but you didn’t seem interested in the topic back when we knew each other.

 _Back when we knew each other…_ Eva thinks her heart drops a little bit. And her eyes follow suit only for a couple of seconds to soon meet his again. Chris looks somehow apologetic, but there are no words leaving his mouth. And it’s extremely depressing knowing they've lost each other for such a long time. “Well… It wasn’t really a planned thing. It’s just… I completely messed up my third year in Nissen, there was a lot of things going on back then” she starts and Chris leans forward listening to her every word. That realisation shakes her to the bone and she’s not sure, if she manages to fight the blush off of her cheeks. That’s why she talks again. She’s always been good with words. Not with him, though. Never with him. “Noora and I started getting mutually annoyed with each other, didn’t really see eye to eye anymore and it really took a toll on me. I started partying a lot again, especially during the Russetiden and even though I didn’t fail the classes or the exams, I didn’t do well on them either. Then I decided to take a gap year, since I didn’t really know what to do at all. And one day Sana decided it was enough of that. She was already halfway her first year studying medicine and still found some time to call me out on my bullshit. She brought some pamphlets and documentaries about jobs that she thought might suit me. And one of them was _The war room,_  you know the one about the campaign team involved in ensuring Bill Clinton’s 1992 election campaign over George Bush Senior.” Eva can see he doesn’t know, what she’s talking about, but it’s funny, when he nods anyway. “Soon I was watching another one called _The century of self_ and it all seemed to be so interesting and powerful to me. So I started reading everything I could find about the topic and I took my exams again. And my life actually fell in place after I got accepted to UiO. I don’t know, I really like what I’m doing and I think I’m quite good at it” she finishes her rant with a smile and this time blushes at his open mouthed grin.

It actually seems like they’re back in Nissen, her rambling about something she was excited about and him listening to her speak with a wide smile. Her stomach is twisted to its limit at the memory.

“That sounds amazing. Really!” he adds, when she clearly looks surprised with his words and a little bit ashamed with her burst of monologue. Chris is smiling from ear to ear though, as if he recollects the same thing  she did a moment ago. “I’m so proud you’re doing something you really enjoy. And you have a job, right?”

Eva’s a volcano of emotions at this point, her body is lava, hot and liquid and she wants to laugh at herself thinking that she has changed through all these years, because apparently she hasn’t at all. All it takes are his eyes on her and she’s back when they left off. 

“Yeah, I’m an intern in this Rasmussen PR Company. I started at the beginning of last semester and they actually keep talking about proposing me with a real job offer after I finish my internship for them. So life is pretty good right now.” She remembers Astrid's words and is so glad her friends can’t see her this agoged. She manages to nod with a surely looking smile and cocks her head to the side, watching his curious eyes on her.

Eva props her chin on the ball of her hand, as the other one plays with a stem of her wine glass and in this small moment of silence, she catches him monitoring both of them for only a couple of seconds. She squints her eyes in confusion and soon when he looks back at her and notices her expression, he instantly looks to the side. _Was he… Was he searching for rings?_ She asks herself, as the realisations hits her with another wave of unwanted heat. Chris looks back at her now, hints of blush colouring the tips of his ears and he clears his throat dismissing her silent question.

Eva holds back her chuckle and instead looks back at him gladly changing the topic. “So what about you, starboy?” Her smirk is teasing and he obviously catches the reference, because he's chuckling and smiling again. She joins him then, both of them remembering the time it was his caller ID on her phone, referring to his favourite song back then.

“What do you want to know?” he shots back with a smirk, but Eva clearly notices him tensing up a little bit.

He’s holding the glass in both hands now, thumbs drawing circles on its surface and his eyes seem to bore into her own. “I don’t know. Tell me your story. Last time I checked you were a simple freshmen cadet and now… Look at you!”

Eva tries to sound nonchalant, even though her insides are growing more and more anxious about her own curiosity.

“It’s not a big of a deal, actually. The whole thing might seem impressive at first, but in reality it’s just a combination of accidents, good luck and my determination.” He sighs and it’s the kind of sigh, that holds a lot of emotions in it. Eva scrunches her forehead because of that observation.

“It still sounds like a big deal to me, actually.”

“Okay” Chris simply says, sending her a small smile over his glass of wine. He takes a big sip and goes back to playing with the stem. Eva doesn’t know, what to expect anymore. “So on my third year in the army we were informed that the king was visiting our camp. And I was one of the best recruits in my year and of course the best looking one.“ He winks. Eva rolls her eyes. “We trained really hard to show the royal family how good of soldiers the school were making us. They picked the best of us to present the dexterity exercises and I was among them. They paired me with this guy. He was a rookie, but he was very tall and muscular, so he presented himself well. So when the day came we were all stressed out, but we knew what we were supposed to do. I was climbing one of those wooden walls and he was only supposed to secure me with the rope and... I don’t exactly remember what happened, but I know I was already pretty high and then I felt a heavy tug on the line. A second later I lost footing and the last thing I remember was falling down.”

Chris takes a break and Eva can see how hard it is for him to continue. She instantly regrets asking anything about his past, but after a moment of silence,  he takes another breath and looks at her with a soft smile. She’s at a loss of words. She doesn’t know what to tell him, really. He’s here and he’s alright, doing better than ever, she supposes, so the only thing she can think of is reaching over the table and squeezing his hand in comfort.

The feeling of their hands touching is so intense, it’s almost nauseating. He looks down at their linked hands and up at her face, his smile much wider than before and Eva finds that moment to be a perfect time to withdraw her hand.

Chris clears his throat and looks up. “Apparently the guy was so stressed, he passed out on spot. And after I woke up in the hospital, I found out I broke both of my legs, my collarbone and arms in many different places but the doctors said I was extremely lucky to not break my pelvis or even my spine. I spent months in the hospital and had dozens of surgeries, then I spent another long time in reablement.” She can instantly tell he’s told that story too many times to too many people. It's like he memorised every sentense and tries to tell everything to you in the way that doesn't really let you feel sorry for him. Eva thinks it must be the way he protects himself. “As you can see, it ended up just fine with me, the army hired the best doctors to fix me up. Of course I was dismissed from my duty with all the honors, apparently the king insisted on that. After that they raised my military rank and since they didn’t know what to do with me, but still felt responsible for what happened, they proposed me with the position of the army spokesman’s assistant.”

Eva feels extremely heavy right now. The urge to hold his hand again feels almost unbearable. So she decides it’s time to speak. “Well that’s not the story I was expecting to hear. I’m really sorry it happened to you.”

“Thanks” Chris says with a shy smile, before shaking his head. “I’m sorry, I know that sounds depressing...” Eva is about to protest, but he quickly continues with a smile. “But I’m not thinking that way. I just had to find positivity in all that. It happened to me and I could’ve ended up much worse, but I’m okay and like you said, life’s pretty good right now. I’m here in the best possible company, after all.” Chris smirks, knowing how the complement must be affecting her and he’s right. Because she can only inhale shakingly, not knowing what to say anymore. That’s why she looks down at her empty glass and doesn’t even try to stop her cheeks from blushing this time.

When she looks back at him, his expression is smug, but his eyes shine with such honesty, it clears her mind in seconds. “That’s not the whole story, isn’t it?” Eva continues and he tilts his head to the left, smiling at her knowingly.

“No, it isn't” he answers, stopping for a moment. “The man I worked with, Anders was an incredible specialist and an even better person. If we didn’t have so little time together, he would’ve easily become a father figure to me. He taught me more about myself in the two years we were working together, than I had ever learned before.” Chris’ smile is nostalgic and Eva remembers those late nights or early mornings, when they were laying in bed, talking. They’ve always had so many things in common; daddy issues was one of them and even though Chris’ dad never left his family the same way Eva’s did, he might as well had done that, because he was never there. “Anyway, the thing about Anders was that he was battling lung cancer. I’d known that from the start, because that was one of the reasons I was there. They needed someone by his side and I was honored to be that person for him. He took me places, he introduced me to many important people like he had been planning for me to take over his job this whole time. And when he had bad days or struggled with chemo effects, I was the one who substituted for him. When he died over a year ago, the army decided I was qualified enough to offer me his position. Apparently that’s what he wanteds too. So… Here I am…”

“Wow…” Is all that Eva can really say. “I’m sorry...”

“You’ve already said that” he says nudging her foot with his own with a playful but sincere smile on his face.

“Are you alright, though?” Eva asks with a hint of concern and she really doesn’t want to despise herself that much for that.

“Yeah, I’m completely fine” Chris assures. “Except for when the weather is a real bitch and I can feel it in my bones, I’ve never been better. Especially now.”

His honest smile and bright eyes cause an intense mixture of emotions deep inside her and she doesn’t really know how it connects with owning his ass tonight. Because she totally doesn't and if she is to be true to herself, somehow it feels like he owns hers. Again.

They’re served their food almost immediately after; _risotto ai funghi_ for her and _pappardelle ai frutti di mare_ for him and since Chris is not playing any more games tonight, Eva thinks, he orders bottles of both wine they’ve been slowly drinking so far. “We still have things to discuss and we could use wine for that, huh?” he throws with fake nonchalance, when the waiter is still at their table. Eva visibly gulps as the waiter awkwardly leaves announcing he's going to go get their drinks.

The food smells delicious and tastes incredible. Eva’s taste buds are in heaven and she fawns over her risotto the whole time. She ignores the way Chris’ eyes roam over her face during their meal, as if memorising the view, because the way he looks and smiles at her the whole evening is way too intense to analyze. She can’t really think about that, when she’s barely holding herself up right now.

Chris laughs wholehartedly, after she moans at her her food again and has his laughter always been this extraordinarily beautiful?

“Okay, okay. Really Eva? It can’t be that amazing.” He smirks her way, as she gasps offended.

“Huh? Are you insulting my food right now?” Her eyes are playful and his smirk widens at that.

“Of course not. Alright, let me taste it” Chris challenges and Eva matches his expression with a raised eyebrow. They used to share food all the time, but she bites her cheek from the inside, as she recalls the last time she offered him food. She really doesn’t want her smile to fall at the memory, but she composes herself too late and she can see that Chris has caught onto her mood change.

“All right" she finally says, waiting for him to reach over the table and take some, but when he makes no move towards his fork, she rolls her eyes and dips her spoon into her risotto, before passing it too Chris. And of course instead of taking the utensil, he eats it from her spoon holding her gaze with a playful smirk. _Damn, he still has game,_ Eva thinks.

“You were right, that tastes fantastic. Do you want some of mine?” he asks soon after, already swirling his pasta around his fork.

“Why not?” she shrugs, as Chris extends his arm towards her. But she sure as hell isn’t eating from his hand this evening, that’s why she takes the fork and puts the food in her mouth herself. Eva smirks, when she hears him chuckle, before returning the utensil to him.

“It’s good, but mine is way better” she adds after a moment, unapologetically raising her eyebrow at him.

Chris laughs again, but when their eyes meet once more, his laughter softens to quiet chuckles. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

They eat the rest in somehow comfortable silence and when Eva finishes her plate, she reaches for another refilled glass to wash the food with as fantastic wine. Chris is done a moment later and they both look at each other expectedly. The moment is long and they both seem to be reading each other with somehow straight faces. Eva bites on her lower lip, the nervous tick that she has never really outgrown and that’s when Chris exhales loudly.

“I think it’s high time we talk about the elephant in the room?” Chris starts monitoring her and Eva wouldn’t be herself, if she didn’t try to lighten up the situation they’re in.

“They have an elephant here? Where?” she jokes, trying to get her breathing under control, but when he sends her a pointed look, her smile immediately falls.

“I’ve wanted to talk to you about it ever since I fucked everything up at that party and I thought I’d never get the chance to do that” he says low and fast, observing her from under his lashes.

 _So it’s happening_ , Eva thinks, squirming uncomfortably in her seat. She’s so glad it does, but she doesn’t think she could ever be prepared enough for that. She’s silent, waiting for him to speak. And when he still doesn’t say anything, she sighs to herself, slightly annoyed. “Talk fo me, then.”

Eva can say, he can sense the way her voice has just gotten stiff, that’s why he scrunches his brows together, looking down at the table.

She looks up at him, when he scoffs, shaking his head disapprovingly. “For all these years I’ve had a speech prepared for this occasion, knew every word by heart…” Eva can barely take his broken tone, but the ache inside her and the anger that has been hidden somewhere for all these six years surprisingly are finally there, out in the open and he can obviously tell as well. “And now I’m here with you and I can barely form a sentence. But I’ll try… So my only question is: will you listen to what I have to say?” he stops there, looking at her straight face for any sort of affirmation and she feels like she’s there but not fully. Not really. The silence is longer, than he probably expects it to be, so she finds some strength in herself that lets her nod. “Okay, okay…” Chris breathes out with relief. “I won’t try to excuse my actions. The fact that I left with someone else was one of the worst things I’ve ever done. Probably the only one I will never be able to forgive myself.” She can’t look at him right now, because everything flashes in front of her eyes again, because she still feels pathetic at the thought that it’s been years and she’s an adult and she shouldn’t have been bothered about this anymore, she shouldn’t have been this broken for such a long time. That’s why she can’t look at him right now. She can’t show him how messed inside she really is by this. She knows he can tell, though. His pained voice is a confirmation of that. “I can only try to tell you why I think it all happened. Would you be interested in that?” he pauses, clearly waiting for her to look up at him, so she complies. Only this one time, she tells herself.

Eva looks him in the eyes and is suddenly overwhelmed by the sadness inside them, before she finds herself saying, “Yeah, I would.” Her voice sounds so small, she can’t hate herself enough for that.

“You don’t have to believe me, considering what I did later on, but I really was in love with you, Eva. It was the first time, I’d ever felt something like that.” She grinds her teeth together and closes her eyes at the confession, because it hurts too much hearing these words from him. “I realised it months before everything that happened, maybe during Christmas, maybe when I was leaving for army, I can’t really tell. But one day I simply knew. I didn’t tell you anything, I knew you weren’t ready to hear that and I didn’t want to press you into anything you didn’t want. But when William came back for Noora I just remember thinking “Why can’t I be like that?” We were on the way to your party both silent, anxious and confident at the same time. And the way you looked at me, when I got there bore into my mind forever and it was now or never moment for me. I still couldn’t say all these things out loud, but we did spend every possible day together during those two weeks. And that day when I met your mother, I understood how much work it would still take to convince you how real my feelings were for you. And even though it hurt like hell, when you told me we’d never be together, I knew how defensive you could get about these things. I just enjoyed the fact that you were still with me, kissing me, laying in bed with and I knew that I just needed to be patient with you.” They’ve been looking each other in the eyes for some time now and Eva can’t even form any single thought about this whole situation. It’s like her brain is frozen, unable to control both her physical and mental functions right now and has to chose just one. Chris’ voice is low to the point he’s almost whispering and the conversation is so intimate, she feels like they are the only people in the restaurant right now. “I texted William that I loved you a couple of days before the party and he was so insistent that I didn’t, we fought over the texts harder than we had ever done before. He showed up at my place the next day with whiskey as a peace offering and he brought me some news about you.” _No_ , Eva immediately thinks as Chris’ jaw visibly tightens. _Noora wouldn’t have told._ She can feel her throat closing over a growing sob, because both these things are breaking her heart right now. She looks at him, all the anger washing away from her body. Her eyes are wide and she doesn’t know anything anymore. ”I just- I just felt so hurt, you know” he finally says looking away from her.

“Chris…” It breaks out of her tight throat, before she can even think about it. Their eyes meet for the first time in a while and she just stops with his name rolling out from her tongue, because she can’t even think, she can say anything else.

 _You promised to listen to me._ His sad eyes tell her. _I am._ She hopes hers do.

“It was the night before Sana’s party and I drank myself unconscious  really late into the night. And the next day I just shoved it all to the back of my head and did everything the way I thought I was supposed to do. I picked you up and we went to the party, but when we got there, suddenly it all came crashing down on me, because Jonas was the only one I could focus on. Even though he was there with Emma, he was looking at us the whole time, sending me dirty smirks every time I caught him staring. I knew he could tell I found out you had sex with him. And I felt hurt and so humiliated, because of course I had to ask him for advices days after you got with him-”

“You what?” She can barely breathe, because everything feels so surreal right now.

He spares her a glance, as he gulps on his wine. “I asked him for advice after you told me you’d never be with me. And I didn’t even take the stupid advice he gave me. And I hated myself for that, because you hated my flowers and I kept thinking about how well he knows you. You kept talking about the food and I was so hurt I couldn’t even look at you, I couldn’t stand him watching us. And then I did the stupidest thing. I don’t know if I wanted to hurt either him or you.” He straightens up, sighing and with that one exhale she can see that his body relaxes. “And from what I saw later, I think my childish stunt only hurt myself” he chuckles humorlessly at the last sentence and empties his glass, before reaching for a bottle and refilling it once more. Eva does the same thing and he refills her glass with a barely visible smile.

She presses the glass against her lips, not really intending to drink it straight away and she can feel her mind drifting back in time and analyzing it with this new perspective. Every memory seems to be fresher then ever. Even back when it happened her mind was fogged with anger, sadness and often alcohol. But now it all seems to be so clear. His intentions and his feelings seemed to be so transparent when she really thinks about it now. And he did seem so out of it the whole day, she could see he was clearly hungover. She dismissed it because of her own nerves. But, god, how could she be so blind?

“I was about to tell you everything.” Eva finds herself voicing her thoughts and both of them seem to be surprised when she finally speaks. She catches his gaze and it’s like she finally knows what to say. “I wanted to take you up on your offer after the party.” And suddenly it feels so easy to tell him all these things. “I thought everything through, I planned the whole night for us. I wanted to tell you that I slept with Jonas and why I did that. I was hoping you would understand and give me a chance to make it up to you and tell you how I felt about you. How in love I was with you.” She holds his gaze for a moment, because she needs him to know that, even though it’s probably the first time she says it out loud. “But then everything went to shit and you did not only hurt yourself but me as well, Chris.” He bites on his lip, regret painted all over his face, but she isn’t done speaking yet. “I’ve just never thought how much of it was my own fault.” She downs half of the glass, collecting her own thoughts. God she was a fool, thinking she could make it through this evening unscattered.

“W-Why did you sleep with Jonas, though?” he asks her with a straight face and she feels her cheeks burn again, as she squirm under his questioning gaze.

“I don’t even know. My feelings for you were always so overwhelming and when you showed up at my party I simply felt consumed by them. And the relation between us had always been so intense. I think that was the day when you went to catch up with William and all of the feelings and insecurities hit me so hard I think I just panicked. Jonas and I weren’t even close friends with each other at that point. He annoyed me and we were at two completely different places in life and I can’t even understand, why I went to his apartament and let the evening carry on the way it did. I didn’t know he was with Emma.” She’s pretty disgusted thinking about herself that night, but she can’t really change her mistakes now. She looks at him and she’s surprised when his eyes seem to take all of her in. “I never wanted to hurt you either, Chris. I know I probably drove you to the one thing you never wanted to do again.”

Chris holds her gaze once more, his beautiful smile widening and reaching his eyes and suddenly she can feel a new wave of excitement crushing inside her body and filling all of it with trembles. Her own smile is so wide, it hurts her cheeks, before she covers her face with her hand and pinches the bridge of her nose. “Wow, we were both so stupid,” she says squinting her eyes, before facing him. “We really managed to screw that up.”

Chris laughs openly and she never wants to stop hearing this sound. “Yup” he sing songs and she really needs to take a breath. Especially when he puts his arms on the table and leans closer towards her. “And now when everything’s out in the open, can we finally forget it and leave it all behind?”

“I think we could try” she answers bringing her glass forward. “Let’s drink to that.” They clink their glasses together with smiles ghosting their faces.

 ***

They leave the restaurant not really feeling up for desserts after all that wine. Chris insists on paying and she lets him, not really having enough fire left inside her to fight for that case after everything that unfolded that evening. The sky is all cleared out with the clouds long gone and the stars shining and looking down at them. It’s a beautiful view, especially at this time of the year, that’s why they decide on taking a walk back to her apartment instead of catching a cab. It’s not really a long walk after all.

They talk about the smallest of things, telling each other funny stories and anecdotes. Eva tells him about the friends she’s still hanging out with and he mentions that although him and William meet from time to time at different occassions, they're not really friends anymore, but Borkis and him are closer than ever now. They both agree that the night has gotten too heavy to still continue with stories about Noora and William, so they add it to the list of all the _stories for later_ and that really sounds fine to Eva right now.

Eva finishes explaining why she decided to move out of the house, that her mother married a guy and wanted them to move in with him, but Eva felt it was the perfect moment to start living on her own for real and let her mother and Henrik have some privacy, when Chris surprises her with a question.

“Has your mother ever told you we met? Twice actually?” Eva’s eyebrows rise up to her hairline and she looks at him with a shocked expression. “So she hasn’t!” He laughs loudly, before she can find her voice back.

“What? When?” She watches Chris close his eyes and shake his head with flicker of emotion that kind of resembles embarrassment.

“Well, your mother and I both work for  norwegian ministries, so I suppose we both have to appear on government's events from time to time. There was this charity gala organized by the royal family that all the officials were invited to attend and it was the first time Anders took me with him. I felt so important going to an event like that, you know,” he smiles at her cheekily and Eva doesn’t even really controls what’s happening with her feelings anymore “and Anders keeps introducing me to all these people. I remember we were talking with the chief of the army and some vice minister when Anders gasps ands shouts “Anne-Marrit, oh god, long time no see”. I look down at the woman he greets and I literally freeze. Because your mom wasn’t as shy as when she caught us in bed, Eva. No your mom looks at me, raises her eyebrow and when Anders is trying to introduce me, she’s like “Oh, we know each other”. I’m already red at this point and I think that will be all she says but of course Anders has to ask her “Really?” and your mother’s like “Oh yeah, I found him in my daughters bed one morning, he promised me to be her boyfriend, never saw him again.” Your mother honestly smirks at me, everyone around us laugh with Anders choking with laughter, while I want the ground to swallow me whole. So much for feeling important.”  

When he finishes Eva’s already holding her side, dying with laughter. He sends a dirty look her way for laughing at him, but after she starts to apologize between her fits of giggles, Chris simply joins her.

“Oh god, I can’t believe she did that. I’m so, so sorry” she manages to say, when her giggles finally begin to die down. He just dismisses it with his hand, jokingly. “What was the other time?”

“It was like a year ago, I don’t remember what kind of occasion that event was for, but we met and greeted each other and your mother asked me “When will that _yet_ happen, Chris, huh? You can share the secret with me.”

Eva shakes her head with amusement, before smirking Chris’ way. “Wow, I almost forgot you were such a drama queen” she tells him, nudging him with a chuckle.

“What can I say?” He only shrugs. Eva can feel he’s looking curiously her way, but she’s still surprised with his question. “Did you tell her what happened between us? Because I feel she would’ve gone much harder on me, if she knew the whole truth.” He winks at her and Eva scrunches her nose at the memory. 

“Oh, no, I didn’t…” she answers still shaking her head with embarrassment. “The fact she found you in my bed, naked, was humiliating enough” she chuckles, before adding. “She asked about you a couple of times, though.”

Eva smiles at the way he raises his eyebrow at her. “Yeah, what did you tell her?”

“That you were out of the picture” she says, biting back her smile.

“Ouch.” He’s the one scrunching his brows right now, and Eva would love to not find that adorable, especially when he bites his lower lip and looks at her nervously. “Was Jonas in the picture?” he finally asks and she feels he has wanted to ask that since their conversation at the restaurant.

She looks down at her shoes, her hands deep in the pockets of her coat and shakes her head. “He walked me back home after the party and I was silent the whole way, while he kept laughing at the whole situation, saying how fucking hilarious that whole thing was. I was so exhausted, angry and hurt at this point, that when we were at my door I simply told him that the whole thing was a mistake and I want him to stay the fuck away from me.” She doesn’t tell him, that they argued some more by her front door, Jonas angrily asking her, if it was because of Chris and her simply nodding and telling him to fuck off with no shame left inside her.

“I never knew what you saw in him. He was always such a douchebag to you” Chris muses into the air, looking up at the sky, keeping his own hands inside the pockets of his leather jacket.

“Yeah...” Eva sighs, biting on her lower lip. “And what about you and Emma?” she asks, even though she clearly remembers Emma dating a guy from her year when they went back to school in August.

Chris immediately looks down at her like she’s crazy. “Me and Emma? God…” He closes his eyes and scrunches them with embarrassment. “Did you notice we looked like twins?” He sends her a ridiculous look and raises his eyebrow, cocking his head to the side, while Eva bursts out laughing. His grin widens, while he watches her and she really doesn’t want to blush, when they talk about Emma and him. (But she really does somehow.) “Actually,” he clears his throat “when I saw you and Jonas kissing, I was like, screw it, I’d give the girl a chance. I met her twice, got a headache from her rambling both times and decided to end it before it even started. Especially after Sana confronted me.”

Half chuckle, half gasp leaves Eva’s mouth and she finds him looking _like that_ at her again. She isn’t able to stop her blush at all this time. “Sana confronted you? Is that what she was talking about earlier?”

“Yup!” he tells her pursing his lips together. “And that story is even more embarrassing than those with your mom.”

“Now you have my attention.” She grins at him, while he playfully rolls his eyes.

“Okay, okay. But if I die from embarrassment, you’ll be the one explaining everything to the police.” He jokes and she mouths _drama queen_  in response. “So it’s like three days after the party and I just come back home from meeting Emma for the second time, completely exhausted. My mother is at the kitchen, when I walk in to greet her and she’s instantly glaring at me and tells me I have a visitor. For a second I thought it was you,” he sends Eva a look and smiles again “but then I look over the kitchen isle and see Sana sitting on the sofa in our living room, observing me with her own glare. I don’t even look at my mom at all, but she tells me Sana’s been here for forty minutes and I know, I’m dead straight away. I decided to be a man about it, because we’ve both been staring at each other for a long time, her killing me with her eyes and me pissing my pants. She stands up when I come closer, greets me with one of those fakes smiles, you know” Oh, Eva knows “and starts straight away in front of my mother “So since you finally showed up, let me tell you something, Christoffer Schistad. I can’t believe I let you into my house among my friends and family, I cant’t believe I let you eat with them, laugh with them and celebrate this important day with them, I can’t believe I let you neer Eva and I can’t believe you played even me into thinking you cared for her. And then you came to my house and disrespected me, my family and most importantly Eva in front of everyone?!” Her voice is like super loud at this point and my mother looks like she’s torn between helping me and joining Sana. Sana’s in my face now, seething, so I think about my last ounces of dignity and fight back screaming that you slept with Jonas. She looks taken aback just for a moment, but then she looks even more enraged and screams straight to my face “Oh, _she slept with Jonas, she slept with Jonas_ , for fuck’s sake you asshole, she slept with him before you guys even talked about getting together… End even if, did you just had to straight up go for that piece of shit in front of Eva instead of clearing up the situation?” and in that moment Sana straight up kicks me in the sheen. I swear to god.” Chris tells her, when he notices Eva’s barely holding her laughter with somehow shocked face. “Don’t look at me like that, she wasn’t finished,” he laughs causing Eva to giggle. “And I swear to god Chris, if Eva gets back with Jonas after this, I’ll come back here and rip you into pieces.” She straightens up, apologises my mother for the inconvenience and walks away. But before she can make it to the door my mom’s in my face and you know that she loved you, so she screams at me “You hurt Eva, Chris? I swear to god, you’re grounded! This isn’t how I raised you!” and of course Sana heard that and started laughing at me, before leaving.” He finishes it with a pointed look sent her way.

“ _I_ swear to god, Chris, you either made all of that up or you have an abnormal memory and a real gift for storytelling.” Eva’s having so much fun right now, she can’t even help, but shake her head with laughter.

Chris grins again, while he watches her and something inside Eva breaks and it feels like she can finally fully breathe again. “Well, I’m a trained spokesman, Eva, storytelling is my profession.” He winks at her. “And I actually think I played it down a little bit. But you know, that was one of those moments you never forget about. And have nightmares afterwards."

“I can’t believe she actually did that” Eva finally says, as her smile softens. “And your mother grounded you, really?”

“Yup. Straight away” he answers with another cheeky smile, after they turned the last corner leading them to Eva’s street.

“And what, you, like, obliged? You were twenty, Chris, I won’t believe in that.” She raises her eyebrow at him, stopping in front of her building entrance.

“Well,” he says swaying on the balls of his feet in front of her. “I deserved it.”

Their eyes meet again and Eva takes a deep breath, before returning his sincere smile. She has nothing to add to that, so she just simply blushes, finally out of words during this eventful evening. And she bites the insides of her cheek, before thinking twice of what she wants to speak about. “So tonight… I’m happy it happened.”

Chris grins even wider, if that’s even possible. “I actually can’t believe it did. I’m so happy we got to talk everything through, though. I was bottling averything up for all this years, but it’s been always there. We both needed this” he says softly, watching her nod, before reaching for her hand. And when he touches her, she feels like her body is on fire again.

Eva takes a deep, shaky breath, similar to his own and when it all seems too much, the meaning of his words shaken her even more. He tugs on her hand and before she knows, she’s in his arms. Her whole body trembles at the welcoming contact and as Chris circles his arms over her shoulders, she envelopes his back with her own and lays her head on his chest. “That was one hell of a night” he adds breathing into her hair and she nods against his chest.

“It was. I’m not sure, what’s going on anymore” she tells him in a small voice, not sure, if he can even hear her voice. His deep intake of air tells her he can.

“I still make you laugh..." She can hear the smile in his voice that completely mirrors her own, as his fingers start to comb her hair. And then he losens his arms from around her, his hands slide to her arms as they part enough to look each other in the eyes. “I still feel it, you know? All the emotions that I couldn’t quite unlock for these past six years. I feel like I’ve finally woken up and I think you feel the same.” He’s opening up to her again and the nostalgic feeling she’s felt the whole evening, finally overwhelms her senses to the point, she can barely hold the sob ripping through her throat. She nods enthusiastically, as his hands slide lower to hold on her own.

“I do” she says, before taking another deep breath. “But we can’t just jump into what we left off those six years ago, Chris. It’s just, you and I are different people now and we need time. If it’s supposed to work, we need to take it slow.” Eva can hear her voice slowly breaking down, before she clings to Chris’ chest again.

“I think I can do that…” he whispers into her hair, before kissing the side of her head.

“Really?” she asks weakly, not even caring about the way it sounds at all, because she can feel his lips smiling against her hair.

“Yes, Eva. I’ve finally gotten you back and I’m not losing you again."

***

Eva’s completely broken down, when she finally gets to her floor after they said their goodbyes. She unlocks the door hastily and when she's finally inside, she closes it and slides down the moment her back leans against its wooden surface (the same way she did at the night of the party after she slammed the door in Jonas' face). She's hysterical at this point, her face flooded with a river of tears, as she sobs and laughs at the same time.

Her friends are at her sides once again, so she cries even more because of that. They’re worried and confused and Eva laughs through her hiccups, because she loves them, oh how much she loves them.

But then Sana looks her straight in the eyes and Eva hopes the only thing her friend sees is the love she feels for her.

“Eva, breathe." Sana commands. "And tell us, what happened?” Her voice is subtle and Eva relaxes with every single one of her words.

“Nothing happened. And everything” Eva says with a grin on her face. “I'm fine.”

“You don't look fine, baby.” It's Astrid and she’s stroking her hair softly.

“I'm fine. Now more than ever.” They look even more confused now and it makes her chuckle. “He told me everything, I told him everything and everything’s fine, everything’s finally fine.” And there’s another sob leaving her mouth.

“Then why are you crying?” Chris asks her softly, as Sana cups the sides of her face.

“Because. I’ve just spent hours riding an emotional roller-coaster. And I’m drunk on wine. And it really was me who hurt him. But he still feels the same. And we’re taking things slow now. And I can’t believe I’ve hated him for all these years.”

The moment Sana leans her forehead against hers, her body simply unclenches. “You've never hated him, Eva” Sana tells her, her voice probably softer then ever.

“No, I never have.” Eva breathes out as her panic attack washes away.

She’s hugging Sana seconds later, as Chris’ and Astrid's arms wrap around the both of them. “Everything’s alright." Sana whispers into her ear and Eva finds herself nodding at the reassurance. "You can be happy now.”

  
Eva finally believes that. She can be happy now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow
> 
> I really did that!
> 
> This chapter is such a mess and I went completely off tracks BUT I've FINALLY written everything I planed on writing, every single scene, every single topic, every single line and haven't taken any shortcuts on the wat.
> 
> Wow...
> 
> I love them. And Eva was supposed have a breakdown again.
> 
> I needed to fix the finale... I promissed I would!
> 
> So please, talk to me about the chapter before I explode.


	5. Reunion part 1

It’s so nice to have everyone back together again. It’s not happening often, once or twice a year these days, since everyone has their lives, so it’s so hard to get all of them under the same roof now more than ever. Not everyone could make it though; Noora and William left to attend a wedding in London, Eskild took Linn to spend a weekend with his parents, Magnus’ grandmother just passed away, so he’s not really up for partying and Mutta and Mikael are prolonging their student exchange stay in Spain for some time now (even though they’re not students anymore), but it was impossible to reschedule, really. All of them are missed, but their gang is so big now, they barely fit in her apartment even now anyway.

 _Wow_ , Eva thinks, she’s never had these many friends in her life before.

She’s enjoying the evening. Catching up with all of them is something she has been thrilled about for a very long time.

Isak and Even are curled on one of the couches and animatedly tell all the stories from their postponed honeymoon road trip around France. Sana, Yousef and Astrid are seated on the opposite couch with Chris Berg and Mahdi half laying on the floor in front of it. Vilde and her girlfriend Anja are cuddled around each other on the cushions kind of oblivious to the world not even trying to pretend they’re paying Isak any attention at all. Jonas, Adam and Elias are on the balcony getting some fresh air/smoking and Eva’s just so, so happy about this whole ordeal, she’s squirming on her armchair with excitement.

And maybe some sort of anxiety as well.

Her phone that lays relaxed in her hand suddenly lights up, instantly making her heart speed up.

 **Chris** ❤️

_Just jumped into the cab_

_Be there in half an hour_

_I honestly thought I’d die from age_

_at this meeting. They couldn’t stop_

_talking…_

Can’t wait ❤️

Drama queen

_Always_

_Have you told them I’m coming?_

Not yet

Isak needs to stop talking as well…

 

_Just tell them before I come, k?_

No worries

_Can’t wait to see you_

_It’s been too long_

We haven’t seen each

for three days, Chris

_Too long ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️_

Eva can’t.

She just can’t.

It feels like a huge energy will burst out of her body any time now. She’s already burning inside, her face the traitor that it is must be showing that to the rest of the world, but she just can’t withhold all of these feelings any longer.

Eva knows she’s grinning like an idiot, but it’s just how she is these days. It’s been five weeks since the dinner and they’re not even together.

Yet.

Or she’s just not so sure anymore.

They’ve taken it slow. So slow it almost hurts. Honestly. But he looks at her like she’s the only thing that exists and it feels too good. Almost unreal.

They’ve taken it slow. But she thinks she’s done with that shit.

It’s been too long, indeed.

Her name and Sana clearing her throat is the first thing that breaks through her haze from outside her bubble. Everyone’s staring at her. Even Anja and Vilde stopped lip locking and are looking at her with raised eyebrows. She didn’t even notice the guys were back from the balcony.

Astrid, Chris and Sana start smirking at her unapologetically just then. She even gets a cheeky smile from Yousef. His fiance/soon to be wife moves her eyes from Eva’s phone to the rest of the group and Eva can’t help but roll her own at that.

And since she has everyone’s attention by now, she might as well make a good use of it, already mentally preparing herself for questions and judgmental stares.

“Okay, so I need to tell you guys something” Eva starts with a smile that surely reaches her eyes. She decides to just tell it and take no shit from anybody. For Chris’ and her own sake. She stopped explaining herself long time ago, anyway. “I invited someone else to the party. He never really was a part of our group, but you guys knew him pretty well.” Everyone looks confused apart from the four people that have been spending time with both of them over the previous weeks, but she just goes for it. With full certainty. “So, I invited Chris Schistad.” Confused expressions turn into shocked ones. “He’ll be here in twenty five minutes or so.”

Silence.

“Is that the guy you used to have a thing with?” That’s Even. He looks genuinely curious and it’s such a difference from what is painted on the others’ faces that Eva simply focuses on that. “The one you went to all the parties with?”

“Yeah, that one” she answers him with a smile.

“Cool.”

“Didn’t know you guys have been in touch after, you know, _the_ _party_.” Isak looks at her with concern, kind of confused as well. And she knows why.

Apart from her three girls, he’s the one she’s been the closest with. It’s not the kind of friendship that’s constantly there, they don’t see each other every couple of days, or weeks even. They simply get each other. He’s been there for her the same way she’s been for him ever since high school. Sometimes they’ve lost touch for months over the years, but always found a way to maneuver back to the place they are now. They’re the same really and she’s so grateful she has someone to share that kind of understandment with.

“We’ve met over a month ago, been in touch ever since” she tells him, even though everyone else can hear it as well. Isak was there for her. She remembers that. He’d knew her deepest thoughts about the whole situation way before she found the courage to confine in Sana and Chris. He knew how broken Chris really left her, how she never really opened herself to love anymore. He listened and never judged - they were way past judging each other at this point - just like she hopes he will now.

“And you’re good with him?” Jonas suddenly asks and it just unnerves Eva to no end. Not only the question but the audacity. He’s been moody the whole evening and she knows his life isn’t really peachy these days, but she would be really grateful, if he didn’t make it so hard on her right now. Especially since he’s been the one constantly making it worse.

Eva simply won’t be having any of that tonight.

“Okay, you guys. I know that basically _everyone_ in here knows how things with Chris and I ended _SIX_ years ago and I appreciate the fact that you’re concerned, but answering your question Jonas; yeah, Chris and I are good.” She looks straight into Jonas’ eyes to the point he lowers his gaze. “We did some stupid shit to each other back then. I really fucked up and the fact that he getting back at me at Sana’s party ended everything we’ve had, hurt both of us even more. After we met last month we honestly sat down and talked for hours about the whole thing. And yeah, we’re good. Probably more than good, actually.”

Eva can’t believe she’s actually blushing after literally blurting all of that out, but it's just the effect he has on her. She looks at the girls and they’re grinning so hard, they instantly infect the whole group with their positivity.

“So you’re back together with Penetrator Chris, huh?” Isak chuckles her way and it makes her playfully roll her eyes at him. “What a plot twist.” Everyone laughs then and Eva finds herself joining her friends.

“Technically we’ve never been together in the first place…” Eva’s statement is met with at least four pair of eyes rolling at that, but she ignores it, since a hot blush creeps its way up her body. “But we’re trying to get to know each other again and we’ve put ourselves out there, for real this time. We really want this to work.”

“They’re taking it slow.” Astrid giggles mockingly at Eva and the other girls follow suit.

“They’re taking it sooo slow they haven’t hit the first base yet” Chris throws sarcastically and most of them look at Eva with such shocked faces, she’s almost embarrassed.

“Are we sure we’re talking about Eva and Penetrator Chris.” Vilde looks truly confused but others actually find her comment extremely amusing.

“So are we good here?” Eva finally asks and everyone nods at her, totally cool with the whole situation. “Great then. He’s coming here straight from work, so don’t be surprised if he shows up in his uniform” Eva jokes warningly, although she hopes to check him out in his suit again, it just really does things to her she wishes it wouldn’t have.

“What does he do for a living?” Isak asks leaning back into his husband’s arms.

“He’s the representative of both the Army and the Ministry of Defence.” And it's not her nor neither of the girls who respond to Isak’s question. It’s Jonas. He looks bored, almost bitter as he moves his eyes to the drink he’s constantly sipping on while everyone else’s land on him.

“Seriously?” Isak throws in Eva’s direction, but before she even has a chance to answer, he instantly questions Jonas. “And how do you know that?”

“Don’t you uncultured swines watch any news?” Mahdi chimes in making half of them snort. “And live under a rock and have no access to internet?” And when he's met with blank stares, he shakes his head and chuckles. “Jesus. Whenever something happens in the world, he’s the one commenting on it. Kind of have to admit I spit my dinner out the first time I saw Officer Schistad on the news.”

Eva can’t help but laugh then. She’s just imagining the whole situation, but knows she’d probably choke to death, if that was her in Mahdi’s place.

 

***

 

Eva leans against a counter in the kitchen, sipping on her whiskey and coke a short time later. She’s propped against Sana’s arm on her right and they both snicker from time to time at Chris and Vilde catching up in front of them, since both have been still extremely close till this day. Chris has always had an infinite patience for Vilde’s behaviour. And that was one of the things that Eva didn’t share with her best friend. Sure the blonde matured a lot, but she will never outgrow the silly, naive personality they’ve gotten to know that first year in high school.

 

The whole buzz around Chris has died down a couple of minutes after Eva’s news with Isak purposely steering everyone’s attention back to his and Even’s honeymoon. Eva is really grateful for that, especially since she’s been combusting with emotions even more than ever tonight. Soon enough Vilde offered to make all of them drinks for old time’s sake and the three of them followed her into the kitchen.

It’s been fun, almost refreshing, listening to Vilde rant about her and Anja and other stuff that always come out of her mouth like a word vomit.

Vilde’s whole story is still an enigma of sorts to Eva, even though they’ve heard about her lesbian awakening many times during all these years. To be honest, Eva had always suspected Vilde was in denial about being into girls, but neither her nor the girls would’ve never made any type of comment about her sexuality, since she clearly wasn’t ready to come out of her huge walk in closet. (Even though she kissed Eva herself multiple times and always enthusiastically commented on it.)

But then Magnus got into the picture and they were so in love it was sickening in the worst possible way. But Eva was happy for her friend, especially since Magnus gave her the attention and love a girl like Vilde needed and deserved. She even followed him to Trondheim for her second year in university and Eva remembers to this day how Vilde daydreamed about getting married and starting a family with her boyfriend.

That’s why it was so shocking that not even eight months later Isak told her she dumped him for a girl named Tove.

Eva remembers finding the news so ridiculous at the time she got angry at Isak for trying to prank her like that. She later found out that it was indeed true. Magnus was devastated, Isak told her once, he really took it badly. He dropped out of university, moved back with his parents and sulked for a really long time. Eva remembers Isak telling her how they met him for the very first time after the break up, how he seemed alright but kind of off and they didn’t know how to handle that. So they started joking and making fun of each other like always and all of a sudden one of them joked about how ridiculous it is that the first girl Magnus fucked turned out to be a lesbian, which resulted in Magnus breaking down in sobs.

Long time passed since that happened and Magnus she’s met in high school isn’t exactly the same Magnus she’s friends with now. They’re not really close, but after he resumed his studies on UiO he landed in her university department and they have lots of common friends, that’s why partying with Magnus has been a regular thing of hers over the last couple of years. He’s also a huge charmer these days. His game increased so much, it’s astounding to whomever knew Magnus back in school. He’s a ladies’ man, a handsome one actually and Eva experienced on her own skin at one of the parties how he can playfully flirt a girl into blushy, hot mess.

And Magnus’ alpha male awakening is probably what unsettles Vilde the most.

“I can’t believe Magnus hasn’t showed up. After all these years you’d think he’d be chill about me dumping him” Vilde chirped over her glass of whine.

Eva finds Sana’s eyes in seconds and they both restrain themselves from rolling their eyes.

“His grandmother died, Vilde. It has nothing to do with you” Sana says calmly rolling her eyes this time. “Besides he’s with someone else now.”

Vilde’s eyebrows rise with interest and before she even has a chance to comment on that, her eyeballs practically come out of their sockets moments before Eva feels two hands subtly touching her arms.

She burns instantly from head to toes and before she can even stop herself, her eyes close as a breath catches inside her throat.

She comes back to her senses only seconds later and looks up at him the moment his lips connect with her cheek. Chris towers over her these days, she starts getting used to that and when she finally looks back at him as his hands trail over her arms while her body aches to lean against his chest, she lets herself feel lost in his touch for just a little bit longer.

“Hi” Chris finally tells her, grinning that huge grin of his - the one she probably matches right now - while his eyes glint with happiness and some sort of mischief she hasn’t seen on him in years. Her reaction to his touch clearly obvious to him.

“Hi yourself” Eva breathes out not even feeling ashamed of sharp intakes of air and her stinging cheeks.

His head leans lower, just over her ear and Eva melts at the feeling of his lips grazing the skin of her ear as his hot breath tingles her cheek. “You look absolutely edible tonight” he tells her and she basically goes undone over the phrase she hasn’t heard in years. Chris loved to tell her that back in the days. He knew the effect it used to have on her and she loved to hear him say it. Especially since it was always a promise he kept for later.

He steps back with a soft smile and fire in his eyes as they hear one of the girls clear her throat.

Eva watches him hug Chris, then Sana, before casually waving in front of their other blonde friend.

“Hi Vilde, long time no see” Chris says as he retreats to her side.

Her friend looks at him wide-eyed and Eva wants to laugh at her ridiculous reaction. “Yeah, hi Chris. N-nice uniform” she mumbles at the lack of anything else to say.

Chris chuckles beside her, before shrugging. “Thanks. It’s a nightmare really, but work is work. Plus, Eva digs it, so I can’t really complain.” He catches Eva’s eyes again and winks at her, before embracing her and pulling her against his side. Eva can’t really shake off the feeling that he looks like a man on a mission somehow.

Sana snorts at them and the familiar reaction makes Eva relax a little bit, before smiling herself. It’s a moment later when Sana takes the girls back to the living room, but not before sending a knowing look Eva’s way.

She clings to Chris’ closeness almost subconsciously and his warmth spreads over her side as they watch Eva’s friends walk away with amusement. Chris chuckles again and when she looks up to his face, he eyes her with this smug but sincere expression of his, before his expression visibly softens. Apparently Eva can’t really hide how flustered she is, because in an instant his thumb grazes her warm cheek.

_Fucking hell._

“Speaking of, is it okay if I change and freshen up in the bathroom?” Chris finally says after moments Eva spends at drinking in the way his eyes twinkle looking down at her.

“You don’t have to ask that” Eva tells him with a lazy smile. “You can drop your stuff in my room, if you like.”

Chris grin widens in an instant and nods without saying anything else in the matter. His arm slowly leaves her body and Eva tries not to mourn the loss too much. “I should probably say hi to the others first, though. Astrid opened the door for me and then I noticed you in the kitchen, so I just made a beeline in your direction.

Eva nods with a smile, trying to convince herself, she’s not affected by his words _that much_. “Let’s go then.”

“Did you tell them?” There’s a crack in his confidence for a second and she can just tell how essential it is for him to feel accepted by the group of people that’s so important to her. Especially if they all know - and probably expect - the worst from him.

“Yeah, no worries, everyone’s chill” she tells him, talking his hand and squeezing it with reassurance.

“Sure?” Chris asks squeezing back. And doesn’t let go.

 _Fucking hell_ , they’re holding hands now. Eva’s mind is blown away but that simple gesture. They’d done so many things before. But holding hands? That’s fucking news. That’s why it’s so hard to sound unbothered and answering a simple “Sure.”

“Hey man!” Yousef shouts the moment they walk in and soon enough Eva watches Sana’s fiance giving Chris a quick hug. “Feeding Eva’s kinks, I see” he states motioning towards Chris’ outfit, which makes Eva want to glare at him. She’s quickly distracted by Chris’ wide grin and nonchalant shrug, though.

_Damn him for making such things sexy._

It’s crazy how fast and well Yousef and Chris clicked the first time they met. It took them only a couple of minutes to joke around like old friends, which made Eva and Sana look at each other with raised eyebrows. And Eva understand, really, it’s easy to be Yousef‘s friend, since he’s always been able to make people like him.

So has Chris, actually.

It takes off from then. Chris and Chris share a special handshake they have at this point, before Isak walks over as the first of the group to greet Chris after all these years. It’s a bundle of back patting, hands shaking and laughing, but it doesn’t slip by Eva’s notice that Jonas is the only one who stays in his spot, eventually sharing an awkward nod with Chris.

And to be honest, Eva thinks, it’s probably as good as she’ll ever get.

Chris leaves to freshen up a moment later and she tries to ignore the curious stares and knowing smirks as she sits down in her previous place on the couch interested solely in her drink. Others join her soon enough, finding new topics to talk or laugh about and thankfully it helps Eva relax a little bit.

Until he’s back.

In black Nikes and skinny jeans rolled at the ankles, slightly oversized geometrical, striped t-shirt and hair that looks a little bit looser than their gelled form from before.

And it makes Eva literally start to sweat.

 _Christ_ , he’ll be the death of her one day, she swears.

He smirks when he notices the way she oggles him, but it’s kind of soft, so it makes her blush even harder. Chris stops behind the couch she’s sitting at, his hands leaning on the backrest as he closes the distance between them and asks “I’m going to the kitchen to fix myself some whiskey and coke. Do you want me to take care of that?” He points to the empty glass she holds against her open lips. Eva looks down at the lack of liquid in it and sighs when he chuckles quietly.

“Yeah. Fix me something strong and good” she says handing Chris the glass before she watches him walk away to the kitchen.

Eva zones out right then, she knows that. But she tries to calm down a little bit to the point she mutes most of the sounds around her. Her eyes find him the moment he steps back into the room, though.

“...and then he looks up and chokes on water!” Astrid has everyone’s attention at this point and she’s fully laughing by the end of the sentence. Eva watches Chris come back with their drinks and scrunch his face as he hears what the conversation is about.

“God Astrid, haven’t you gotten tired of telling that story?” He chuckles, even though it’s clear to everyone that his ears redden with embarrassment.

“No and never will.”

“You’re ruining my reputation” he complains jokingly and she shrugs in response. “But I’m a proud man, and won’t deny it. It was probably more horrific from my perspective than yours. Especially since that douchebag who hit on Eva stole everyone’s attention just seconds later.”

“You talking about Alex?” Astrid smirks raising her eyebrow.  Chris shrugs, visible annoyed. “You know, he keeps telling Eva she’ll be his wife one day.”

Eva watches Chris straighten against his seat, his eyes easily finding hers as his whole expression gets serious. The fact he looks one hundred percent smug anyway makes Eva the hottest she’s been in years.

“You can tell him,” Chris finally says after a moment of silence “that he's not the only one planning on that.” Eva’s mind and body literally freeze not really acknowledging his serious and knowing look. “And from _my perspective_ , I’m the one closer to completing it.

Silence.

Everyone’s silent for a long time, before Isak’s eyes come out of its sockets as he looks around the group before setting his eyes on Chris. “Duuuude.”

And Eva can swear she’s watching the scene from the afterlife.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been too long...
> 
> It took me too long...
> 
> I'm so happy I can post at least half of the chapter I planned...
> 
> Please comment on the fic, guys, let me know what you think <3


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